


He Doesn't Want To Know

by Fanfan_la



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Mpreg, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-29 13:16:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6376270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanfan_la/pseuds/Fanfan_la
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A sad divorce, and a new marriage.</p><p>A broken family, and a new child.</p><p>Lies and truths, stories and facts.</p><p>Will Minseok and Luhan ever find their way back to each other, or are they doomed to live separate lives?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So, there's  
> \- Implied mpreg (with Minseok and Sehun).  
> \- Out of character personalities and crying (that's just how I write *shrugs*)  
> \- Fluff and angst
> 
> I do plan for Xiuhan to somehow get back together again... somehow.

"Mama?" A tiny voice said quietly in the darkness of the bedroom.  
  
Minseok rubbed his eyes, turning his head to look down at his adorable son. "Yes, Yifannie?"  
  
"Why can't you go and see Baba?" Six-year-old Yifan asked sadly, playing with the stuffed toy in his arms.  
  
Minseok choked on his emotions, trying his best not to cry at the innocent reminder. "Because he doesn't want to see me, baby."  
  
"But what about my baby brother?" Yifan questioned, placing a hand over Minseok's barely swelling stomach.  
  
Minseok had just found out he was expecting a child in seven months, two months after his and Luhan's divorce.  
  
Minseok shook his head. "I can't tell him now; not yet, baby."  
  
xXx  
  
"Minseok," a blonde around the redhead's height, said coolly. Behind him was a much younger and taller petite male with brown hair, a hand resting on his slightly rounded stomach. Luhan gazed at the taller male with a soft smile (a smile that used to be reserved for  _him_ ) and wrapped his arm around the other's waist.  
  
Minseok swallowed, trying to keep the hurt out of his voice as he opened his mouth to speak. "Luhan," he nodded, before going back to his job. "What would you like to drink?" He asked, looking anywhere but into the blonde's eyes.  
  
"A cappuccino for me and an almond hot chocolate with cream for Sehun, please," Luhan asked politely.  
  
Minseok nodded stiffly and rung up the orders. He excused himself and swapped with the other cashier to prepare the drinks, begging himself not to burst into tears after seeing his former husband, seven months after the divorce.  
  
_'Seven months, and he managed to bed this man and get him pregnant; probably three months already, with how big he is,'_ Minseok thought painfully.  _'It didn't take much to move on from me, did it, Luhan?'_  
  
Minseok walked himself to the back of the kitchen to fetch the new coffee beans, when he felt the flutter under his apron, which hid the baby bulge safely behind it. "Just two more months left, baby," Minseok whispered. "Two more months and you'll here to see the world." He felt a wet tear drip down to his chin. "I wish I was brave enough to tell your father about you, but he'll never believe me - not after that. And now he has someone else too..."  
  
Sighing, Minseok wiped his tears from his face and schooled a look of apathy, walking back to finish the coffee making.  
  
He didn't want Luhan to see him cry.  
  
xXx  
  
"Mama?" Yifan asked while he was playing with his toys. Minseok sat on the old couch of their small two-bedroom flat, the only place Minseok could afford after divorcing Luhan. Even though he got quite a bit of money from the divorce, he had shoved it all into a savings account for Yifan and his unborn baby's education.  
  
"Yes, baby?" Minseok responded, stroking his large bump; he was eight, nearly nine months now.  
  
"Why can't we go back to our old house?" Yifan wondered, turning his eyes to his tired parent.  
  
"Baby, you can always go back to our old house," Minseok said quietly. _'It's just me who isn't allowed.'_  
  
"But I don't want to leave Mama by himself." Yifan blinked.  
  
Minseok sniffled. "Baby, come here." He gestured for the child to crawl into his lap as best as he could, the bump between them. "Promise me that you'll never hate your father."  
  
"Why would I hate Baba?" Yifan asked. "You and Baba always make up and kiss like in the movies."  
  
Minseok felt his heart crack at the sound of hope in his son's voice. "I'm sorry, baby. But I don't think that's going to happen. Baba can't forgive Mama this time."  
  
xXx  
  
"Here's your baby, Mr Kim," the doctor said with a genuine smile on her face. "A healthy, little boy. I'll leave you two alone for some privacy." The doctor gave one last smile as she laid the baby into Minseok's arms before leaving and shutting the door behind her.  
  
Minseok felt a happy tear slip down his face as he cradled his new-born son in his arms, smile touching his lips. "Hi, peanut. Welcome to the world."  
  
A soft knock made him look up at the closed door. "Come in," he called out softly, voice still hoarse from the screaming he had done an hour before.  
  
Yifan came rushing in, tears down his flushed cheeks as the nurse followed behind. "Mama!" Yifan sobbed, clinging to his father's bed sheet as he made his way over to the bed. "Mama, I was so scared!" Yifan trembled.  
  
Minseok looked at the nurse for an explanation. "Your son heard your shouts from outside," the nurse said, apologetically. "I guess the soundproofing wasn't strong enough."  
  
Minseok nodded, shifting as much as he could without tiring his exhausted body and jostling the sleeping baby in his arms. "Baby, come here," Minseok said softly as he moved to cradle the new-born with one hand and patted the spot next to him, allowing Yifan to climb onto the bed and sit next to him. "Mama's okay now. It just hurt when your mama had to bring your baby brother into the world," Minseok explained simply, petting his son's hair with his free hand.  
  
Yifan dried his tears and sniffled, peering down into Minseok's arms. "Is that my brother?" He asked in awe, staring at the baby.  
  
Minseok nodded, smiling. "Yes, baby. Want to hold him?" He asked. Yifan nodded, holding his arms out. Minseok gently told Yifan to shape his arms like a basket, and slowly laid the baby down in his older son's arms. Yifan's eyes stayed wide as he held his brother in his arms, watching the baby snuffle cutely in his sleep.   
  
"Soo is so cute..." Yifan whispered mindlessly.  
  
"Soo?" Minseok asked.  
  
"Mm," Yifan hummed. "Can we call him Soo, Mama?"  
  
"Maybe as a nickname, not for his full name, baby," Minseok said. He tilted his head, thinking. "I know; how about Kyungsoo?"  
  
Yifan nodded in agreement. "Soo," he said again, kissing his brother's forehead. "Big brother will look after you, Soo," Yifan said, making Minseok melt at how precious his son was.  
  
To the side, the unnoticed nurse continued to take photos for the father, watching the cute scene, which made her glad she was nurse and was able to catch moments such as those.  
  
Shame on the man who had left behind this family thoughtlessly.


	2. Chapter 1: Family

"Appa?" Yifan called as he stepped into the apartment, dusting off his torn jeans. "Appa, I'm home."  
  
Minseok appeared from the kitchen, his now jet black hair pulled into a short ponytail. "Hey, baby," he greeted, kissing his son on the forehead.  
  
Exactly ten years had past since the divorce, and sixteen-year-old Yifan had out-grown calling his father 'mama,' refused to be called baby in public, and was a lot taller than his six year old self - only a few inches shy off six foot three and towering over his father’s head. Nine-year-old Kyungsoo was still as cute, small and chubby as the day he was born. Currently, the youngest was napping in his and Yifan's shared room, exhausted after a day at school.  
  
"How was school, baby?" Minseok asked, wiping his hands on his off-white apron.  
  
"I... That's the thing..." Yifan scratched his head, a little nervous.  
  
"You skipped school again today, didn't you?" Minseok finished off in disappointment. "Yifan, what have I told you about skipping school to go to work at the garage?"  
  
"But Appa-"  
  
"No buts, mister. School is important-"  
  
"Appa!" Yifan raised his voice, forcing his father to cut short on his words. Yifan quietened down again when his father stopped speaking. "Appa, I know school is supposed to be important, but look at you! You barely have any energy as it is, and you're working two jobs every day apart from Saturday, where you only have one! I just thought that maybe working would help you cut down on your jobs." Yifan frowned. "Appa, I worry about you."  
  
"You don't need to work and worry about me, Yifan-ah," Minseok smiled wearily. "I'll be okay as long as you and Kyungsoo are happy, healthy and able to provide for yourselves in the future." He rejected the money offered to him from his son, instead pulling out an envelope of cash from his apron pocket. "Oh, keep that and take the monthly allowance that your Baba send through his lawyer as well."  
  
Yifan snorted and pushed it back gently to his father. "Just put it in Soo's savings account. I don't need it."  
  
"But don't you want to buy some new clothes with it or something?" Minseok asked, stretching his hand back out with the money, as if Yifan wouldn't just refuse again like he had done for the past ten years.  
  
Yifan hesitated before keeping the money he had earned and, unusually, took ₩250,000 from the envelope, before insisting that the rest go into Kyungsoo's account.  
  
Minseok sighed, but agreed to do so later. "Oh wait!" Minseok exclaimed just as Yifan was about to disappear into his room to study. "Your father also called. He asked if you would like to meet, since you were busy all the other times he asked."  
  
"Did you tell him that I'm busy?" Yifan said, not bothered.  
  
"No, I said you'd call back." Minseok frowned. "Yifan, your father is just trying to reconnect-"  
  
Yifan rolled his eyes. "Reconnect? He didn't try since I was seven until now, even though he's been sending me my monthly allowance since then, and suddenly he thinks I'll respond?"  
  
"Yifan, he told you that you had permission to go back home whenever you wanted since we got a divorce," Minseok said.  
  
"Yeah. He would let me come home. But not you, or Soo," Yifan scoffed.  
  
"Yifan..." Minseok said sadly. "Your father and I have been divorced for ten years, and Kyungsoo..."  
  
"...Baba doesn't know that Soo is his son too, I know."  
  
"Yifan... Please, just try for me? Remember as a kid, you promised you wouldn't hate your father?" Minseok pleaded, gripping his apron tightly.  
  
"That was a promise I shouldn't have made. Baba left us for another other man and got him pregnant."  
  
"That's not- It wasn't your Baba's fault, it was mine-"  
  
"Appa! You didn't cheat on Baba! I'm not stupid! Maybe I was young, but I still remember really well," Yifan shouted, surprising his father. "Baba was stupid for believing what he thought he saw and wouldn't even let you explain."  
  
Minseok shook his head. "What Luhan was true; I did nearly have sex with another man."  
  
"But that was because you were drugged, Appa! That was supposed to be you, your son and your trusted boss in a public, safe environment and the bastard drugged you!" Yifan exhaled deeply. "The only good thing was that Baba was so angry he dragged you away from the restaurant with me in tow."  
  
"How- how do you know all this?" Minseok asked incredulously. This was the first time Yifan and said anything on the topic surrounding his and Luhan's divorce, preferring to just keep ignoring his estranged father's messages.  
  
"I'm smart, Appa. I get that from you, you know," Yifan replied, quirking his lips sardonically. "And I have a good memory, so I remembered it and connected the dots as I grew older and understood more."  
  
Minseok trembled, shocked to find that his son had already figured everything out for a while. "Yifan... How long have you possibly known?"  
  
"Since I was fifteen," Yifan said softly. He approached his father, hugging him tightly. "Appa, please understand that I don't want anything to do with Baba. He left us and I can't forgive him for that."  
  
Minseok shut his eyes and sighed. "Please try. He's still your father, Yifan."  
  
"Well, he's a crap father," Yifan sneered. "Why, after all this time, do you still love him? He's done nothing but caused you pain and yet you still love him. I don't understand, Appa."  
  
"We don't choose who we fall in love with, Yifan," Minseok said gently. "Sometimes it just happens, and you can try to move on, but there will always be that little part of you that loves that person. You'll understand when you fall in love, Yifan." Minseok smiled bitterly. "I just hope that it will be someone who loves you back just as much."  
  
Yifan just stayed silent, not wanting to continue the conversation anymore, and leaving Minseok to wonder how he could help his son patch up his relationship with his other father.  
  
"Ma?" A sweet voice called, making the elder son and father turn towards the bedroom door, which was open. Kyungsoo peered his head past the doorframe, eyes wide. "Yifan-hyung!" The boy grinned, bouncing over to hug his older brother.   
  
The tension in the room broke as soon as Kyungsoo entered, brightening the atmosphere as Minseok and Yifan relaxed. Yifan bent down a bit to accommodate his short brother, letting the younger tackle him into a bear hug, laughter falling from his lips. "Hey, Soo."  
  
"What did you want, peanut?" Minseok asked his youngest, using his nickname from birth.  
  
"Mama, I'm hungry," Kyungsoo whined from his position in Yifan's arms, tugging at his father's apron.  
  
Minseok chuckled and kissed his son's forehead. "Food should be done in a few moments, peanut." Minseok sent a glance at Yifan. "Yifan, can you set the table for me?"  
  
Yifan nodded. "Sure, Appa."  
  
He dragged Kyungsoo with him, roping the other into helping as Minseok watched his sons fondly.  
  
Minseok wished that Luhan were there to see how well his sons had grown.  
  
xXx  
  
"Yifan, what is this?" Minseok asked, eyes wide as he looked at the three fancy cards on the kitchen table.  
  
Yifan grinned. "A break for you, Appa. And a day to celebrate my excellent mock exam results," he said, pressing a kiss on his father's cheek.  
  
Minseok gave his son a grateful smile. "This is wonderful, baby, but you really didn't have to. We could have just stayed at home and I could have cooked something nice for you, like we usually do."  
  
"I want to try this whole restaurant outing thing, appa," Yifan whined playfully, before his tone grew more serious. "And on top of that, you've worked hard for me and Soo, so I figured it was time for a little relaxation. So, I booked a reservation for three at your old-time favourite restaurant."  
  
"I..." Minseok didn't know how to respond to his son's kindness. "Thank you, baby," he finally said, hugging his oldest son.   
  
Yifan hugged back, content in his father's arms.  
  
"Mama!" Kyungsoo called. He popped up from the bedroom, half-dressed and hair messy. "Mama, we have to get dressed!"  
  
Minseok felt his lips quirk as he slowly let of Yifan and made his way over to his younger son. "Alright, peanut, but let Mama help you put your nice tie on first, okay?" Minseok then turned to Yifan, who looked like he wasn't going to move any time soon. "And baby, you might to change into more formal clothes," Minseok said, eyeing his son's fashionably scruffy look.  
  
Yifan pouted, but nodded. "Alright, Appa." He trod into the shared bedroom and started looking for something to wear, while Minseok helped Kyungsoo with his tie, a peaceful smile gracing his lips.  
  
xXx  
  
They arrived at the restaurant a few minutes early and were let in with relative ease, the place half full.  
  
Kyungsoo looked positively adorable in his suit and tie, while Yifan tried to get away with wearing as little formal gear as he could, clothed in a blazer, slacks and a white shirt which had the two top buttons undone. His shoes were black canvas shoes that looked like leather shoes if you didn't pay close attention to them. Minseok was wearing one of his old suits that he used to wear when he had an orchestra performance, which surprisingly still fit him, even after seventeen years.  
  
They fit in rather well with the setting of the restaurant, the interior much like a old English hall for grand royal parties; chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, cream-glowing lights giving the restaurant a warm feeling, and waiters dressed in tailcoats.  
  
"Jeez, Appa. What kind of place is this?" Yifan murmured as a male with a dimpled smile showed them to their table. "It's so... old and extravagant."  
  
"Not your kind of place, I take it?" Minseok asked amusedly.  
  
Yifan shook his head. "But I sure could get used to it in the future," he said thoughtlessly, staring at all the designs littered tastefully around the room.  
  
Minseok smiled, glad to see Yifan a little less tense after all the mock exams he was being put through recently. "Well, if you like the look, you'll definitely like the food," he said, before thanking the waiter for the menus.  
  
"Just press the bell on the table when you're ready," the male said pleasantly, bowing before getting back to work.  
  
"Mama?" Kyungsoo said quietly, tugging on his father's sleeve. He was always shy when they were in public, but more so now that they were in the restaurant surrounded by rich people dining.  
  
"Yes, peanut?"  
  
"I don't know what to get. It's too... expensive," Kyungsoo muttered, squinting at the menu.  
  
"Don't worry, Mama brought money with him so you can pick whatever you want," Minseok said, leaning over to help his younger son, and finally choosing the steak meal from the children's section of the menu.  
  
"Appa, I thought I was supposed to be treating you," Yifan hissed when Minseok turned his attention to his elder son.  
  
"Yifan, you know how I am," Minseok smiled.  
  
"I know. But Appa..." Yifan tried to protest. He knew that his father had a hunch about him wanting to use the money he took from the allowance before, and that he hadn't spent any of it on himself.  
  
"We'll split the bill," Minseok said firmly.  
  
Yifan sighed in exasperation, but agreed. "Alright, Appa." He scanned the menu quickly, picking the nicest but cheapest option so the bill wouldn't amount to much.  
  
Minseok already knew his choice from having ordered it so many times when he was younger, so he rang the bell and dictated the ordered meals and drinks to the waiter, who wrote it down and told them it would be ready in ten minutes.  
  
As the waiter left, Yifan turned to his father. "Ah, Appa. There's a basketball game happening on Friday next week. Can I go?"  
  
Minseok raised an eyebrow. "You don't usually go to events like that. Do you even like or understand basketball?"  
  
"Sure I do!" Yifan argued unconvincingly.  
  
"So tell me, which position do you like best?" Minseok asked slyly.  
  
"Um, the middle one?"   
  
"I like the striker!" Kyungsoo interrupted, making Minseok chuckle.  
  
"Basketball's different from soccer, peanut," Minseok said, poking his son's cheek playfully. "Although in basketball, the striker would be the power forward." He then looked at Yifan and spoke. "So, what's the real reason you want to go, Yifan?" Minseok questioned curiously.  
  
"Well, there's this guy that's a close friend of mine..." Yifan trailed off. "He's on the basketball team as well as being in the same maths class as me."  
  
Minseok gave a knowing smirk; his son had a crush! "Of course you can go, Yifan," he said. "But, no funny business, got it? I don't want to find out that my son is-"  
  
"-I know, I know, Appa!" Yifan blushing. "I won't, I promise. I'm not ready to have children until I'm thirty," he said. "Besides, we'd have to be flirting to do any of that first. We're just friends, for now."  
  
Minseok was happy with that; after all, both his children were carriers like himself, and he didn't want them getting pregnant if they ended up being attracted to men, which seemed to be Yifan's case so far.  
  
"Well, that's fine. I trust you, Yifan," Minseok said warmly.  
  
The food came after that, and Minseok thanked the surprised waiter graciously. They ate slowly, wanting to take their time in eating the lavish meal.  
  
"You're right, Appa. The food is amazing," Yifan said, his mouth full of the food he ordered.  
  
Minseok grinned, glad his son was enjoying himself, but gestured to the male to close his mouth while eating. "What about you, Soo?" Minseok asked his youngest. Kyungsoo nodded, beaming as he ate.  
  
"How did you even find this place, Appa?" Yifan asked, finishing his mouthful. "It's pretty obscure; I only found the address because it was in one of my childhood photo albums."  
  
"Your baba used to take me here," Minseok said softly.  
  
Yifan's smile slowly fell. "Oh. Maybe I shouldn't have suggested it then."  
  
Minseok shook his head. "It's fine, Yifan. I do miss the food from here. I had a friend that worked here that used to give me free food while I babysat his eldest son, before you were born. I lost contact with him after Soo was born, and I don't know if he still works here, but I do remember him and his kids staying over once."  
  
Yifan's eyes looked curious. "Really?"  
  
"Yeah. The child and his younger brother were in some of the photos that I took of you and him," Minseok said.  
  
"I think I remember who you're talking about," Yifan said, vaguely thinking about the photos of a him as a pale little baby, seated next to a boy with a cute smile and a baby with elvish ears.  
  
"I can't remember what the youngest was called, but think his eldest son's name was... Ying?" Minseok was interrupted by the same waiter approaching the table, placing a bottle of wine, a bottle of juice and three empty glasses.  
  
"Please ring for assistance if you need anything else." The waiter smiled politely. Minseok nodded in thanks before the waiter left again. He grabbed the bottle of juice, pouring some for his younger son, and then took the wine bottle and poured some for himself and half a cup for Yifan.  
  
"Appa, are you sure?" Yifan asked suspiciously. His father usually would never let him drink, even in his presence.   
  
"Just a bit. You're sixteen now - nearly going to be seventeen in a few months - and I know sooner or later you'll be drinking yourself. I'd rather have it so that you can build up your toleration of alcohol in my presence," Minseok said. "Besides, we're celebrating."  
  
"Can I have some too?" Kyungsoo asked.  
  
"No, peanut. You're way too young," Minseok said sternly. Kyungsoo pouted, but stuck to his juice, which tasted just as great, anyway.  
  
Yifan grinned and sipped at the wine, only to gag at the taste. "Appa! This is gross!" He grimaced.   
  
Minseok laughed at his son's reaction. "Good. I hope you never drink if that's gross to you."  
  
Yifan sulked, but then remembered that he had finished his meal and that his dessert was still there. Brightening, he pushed the wine away and ate his dessert instead. Minseok wiped Kyungsoo's suit jacket with a napkin after the child managed to get a bit of chocolate mousse over it, only to pause when he heard Yifan's spoon clatter.  
  
"Yifan?" Minseok looked at his eldest curiously.  
  
Yifan opened his mouth to speak, only for another to speak before him.  
  
"Minseok?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy reading!
> 
> EDIT: Just corrected some of the mistakes that I found whilst rereading this. Also, for reference, ₩250,000 is around £170/$210 (it varies).


	3. Chapter 2: Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And here comes the angst.  
> Any mistakes you find are purely unintentional, btw. If I find them, I'll correct them.

"Minseok?"  
  
Minseok froze, his heart thumping wildly as he heard the heartbreakingly familiar timbre of a deep voice. He fixed on a smile, unaware of the hard glare on his eldest son's face, and the curious eyes of his youngest. "Luhan, what a surprise," he said.  
  
"It's been a while since we saw each other face to face," Luhan said, a tight smile on his lips. He gestured to his family, who were being seated on the right of Minseok's table. "I'm sure you remember my husband, Sehun, right?" Sehun glanced up and nodded his head in greeting, expression impassive despite knowing exactly who Minseok was to Luhan. "And that's Baekhyun, our son," Luhan said, pointing at the boy who looked like Kyungsoo's age.  
  
"Luhan, Sehun and Baekhyun, this is Yifan and Kyungsoo," Minseok introduced, sending Yifan a sharp look when he saw his elder son open his mouth. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"We were just going out to have one of are usual dinners," Luhan explained. "We happened to be around this area, so we came here." He looked at his former husband. "Why are you here?"  
  
"School celebration for Yifan's mock results," Minseok said simply, while going back to wiping Kyungsoo's jacket.  
  
"Oh," Luhan uttered, suddenly looking a little out of his depth. "Congratulations, Yifan."  
  
"Congrats, Yifan-ah," Sehun said, a small smile on his face. His tiny son uttered the same words brightly, looking as shy but more energetic than Kyungsoo.  
  
Minseok thanked them when Yifan stayed silent, trying not to respond too much because he could feel the agitation coming from the teen, and he knew that his son could have a short temper at the worse of times.  
  
"Yifan-ah," Luhan called, drawing Minseok's attention.  
  
Minseok shot his son a look, as if to say,  _'please be nice, baby.'_  
  
"Yes?" Yifan said coolly, not touching his food.  
  
"I didn't hear back from you a few days ago since I left a message with your father, so I figured you were busy with school," Luhan said.  
  
Minseok looked at his son.  _'You didn't call back?'_  His eyes asked disapprovingly.  
  
Yifan shrugged. ‘ _I didn't want to.'_  He coughed, hiding the silent conversation between his father and himself. "Yeah, you could say that."  
  
"So, I was wondering when you'd like to meet up, to you know, talk a bit," Luhan suggested. "I haven't seen you since you were seven," he said, and Minseok could hear the subtle accusation in his voice.  
  
Minseok lowered his eyes, knowing that it was his fault Yifan didn't want to see his other father because of circumstances that left the teenager knowing who his father was, but was taken away from him at an age where he could remember what it was like to have two parents, only to suddenly being made to adjust to having one.  It was easier for Kyungsoo in that sense; he didn't know who his other father was, only that he had the same father as Yifan, and that he had a birthmark in the same place as him. Minseok wanted to wait until Kyungsoo was a bit older to finally tell him, but now it was too late. With how the conversation was going, Kyungsoo was going to find out now.  
  
"I haven't wanted to see you since I was seven," Yifan said shortly. Minseok cringed, knowing that his son was getting irritated.  
  
"Yifan..." Luhan tried to soothe the situation, but he had already hit a nerve in the younger male.  
  
"Baba, I don't want to meet up or talk to you. You haven't wanted to see me since I was seven, so why should I care?" Yifan scoffed.  
  
Minseok saw the realisation dawn on Kyungsoo as the boy uttered a tiny, "Baba?" He simply held the boy closer to him as Yifan and Luhan kept talking.  
  
"I asked you if you wanted to come home-"  
  
"You asked me if I wanted to move back," Yifan corrected. "I didn't want to leave Appa behind like you did, so I said no."  
  
"Yifan, I don't think you know exactly why your appa and I divorced," Luhan said patiently, although it was clear he was also running out of patience from the blame Yifan was putting on him. "I don't want to make your appa look bad but there is a reason why I left-"  
  
"I know already," Yifan said, rolling his eyes.  
  
"Then you know why I left. It wasn't because I didn't want you, Yifan, okay? I did, but your appa and I just couldn't be together," Luhan said.  
  
"What I know is that you left Appa without letting him explain what had happened. You took everything for face-value and didn't let Appa say otherwise," Yifan said, his face showing his annoyance.  
  
"Yifan, that's enough," Minseok said quietly, holding Kyungsoo, who was looking a little frightened by the change in attitude in his hyung.  
  
"No Appa. Baba needs to hear this," Yifan said, opposing his appa. He looked at his other father, who didn't look so happy anymore. "You decided that just because Appa was with another man when you weren't there, that he was cheating on you. You up and left him, got a divorce, fucked another man, and didn't even give Appa time to explain himself or tell you that-" Minseok hastily covered his son's mouth to stop him slipping up the truth that really didn't need to be made public.  
  
"Your  _father_  didn't make his situation any better for himself when he let me divorce him," Luhan said sarcastically, his patience gone. "And that man I  _fucked_  so happens to be your step-father, so watch your tongue." The brunette turned to Minseok, who avoided Luhan's gaze. "What have you been teaching our child, Minseok?"  
  
"Nothing. I didn't tell him anything," Minseok said quietly, not wanting to get into a fight with his former husband. "He formed his own conclusions."  
  
Luhan gave him a look that said he didn't believe the other man, before looking back at Yifan, breathing deeply and speaking. "Yifan, I get that you love your appa, but you have to understand that your father is not a perfect man. He made the a bad choice which was unforgivable."  
  
"My mama is not a bad person," Kyungsoo said, breaking the stare-off between his brother and his biological father.  
  
Luhan looked at the boy who was the same age as his son, Baekhyun. "Minseok, who...?" He asked, an unreadable look on his face.  
  
"It doesn't matter," Minseok replied, hiding his shaking hand. The truth was on his lips that he couldn't say; not there, where everyone could hear. It was bad enough some heads were starting to turn towards their general direction.  
  
Luhan scoffed. "Whatever," he said, before turning to Kyungsoo. "Maybe your mama isn't a bad person, but he made bad decisions." Then, he looked to Yifan, the latter looking like he wanted to cut his father for speaking to Kyungsoo. "Yifan, you think your father was innocent, do you?" The unwavering expression on Yifan's face answered Luhan's question very quickly. "Then why did he agree to the divorce? Why did he let me leave him?"  
  
Yifan's look became one of confusion, the thought having not occurred to him before.  
  
Luhan continued. "Your father and I could've only divorced if we both agreed to sign the papers, and we both did with full consent. Tell me, if your father was as innocent as you think he is, why did he agree to the divorce?"  
  
"Maybe because you wouldn't let him explain?" Yifan shot, lips curling into a frown.  
  
"You didn't tell him about the pictures, did you?" Luhan said, looking at Minseok coldly. Next to him, Sehun took the still blonde's shoulder and squeezed it tightly, as if to tell him to calm down.  
  
"What pictures?" Yifan asked, before Minseok could reply.  
  
Minseok felt his heart go cold at the glare he was receiving from Luhan, the sight of Sehun touching  _him,_  and the look of pure confusion on Yifan's face.  
  
"I didn't think it was necessary-" Minseok started, only to be cut off by Luhan slamming the table with his hand as he stood up.  
  
"Not necessary?!" Luhan yelled, making all heads turn towards him. "My son wouldn't be blaming me for our broken marriage if it wasn't necessary! You broke our marriage, Minseok! Not me, not Sehun!  _You!_ " He swallowed, trying to contain the hurt in his voice. "You had been playing with your own boss for much longer than that one day I caught you. Those pictures were proof enough."  
  
Minseok felt his face burn at the accusation flung in his face. He could feel the stares on his person, and could imagine the harsh comments that others were making in their heads. He turned his gaze towards Yifan, who looked completely lost.  
  
"Mama?" Yifan said, wide eyes boring into Minseok's own shining ones. "Is it true?"  
  
Minseok's bottom lip trembled because his son called him mama - he hadn't said that since he was  _eleven_  - and didn't make a move to indicate an answer to his son's question, but it was enough for Yifan to understand. The teenager shoved his chair back and left the restaurant, not once looking at his father. Minseok bit his lip to stop the sobs leaving, instead hugging his younger son, who looked utterly confused, not understanding the conversation the adults were having, why his brother left, or why his father was crying.  
  
Baekhyun also looked just as confused as Kyungsoo, not getting why his baba was angry or why his umma wasn't saying anything.  
  
Luhan sighed, slumping back down into his seat as the waiter who was serving Minseok approached the two tables. "Please sirs, if you have a problem, could you kindly take it outside and pay your bill when you leave?" The young male asked, bowing.  
  
Luhan ran a hand through his hair as he took Baekhyun's hand. "Don't worry, we're leaving," he said, motioning to Sehun as he stood up to leave, the taller male following without a word.  
  
Minseok watched the family leave, a heavy feeling in his heart as he stared at Luhan's back, the latter not even turning around as he disappeared through the door.  
  
"Do you want a tissue?" A voice asked from Minseok's left. The waiter had his hand out, a tissue stretched out to the crying male. Minseok nodded in thanks and took the tissue, drying his tears on it as the sound of footsteps approached his table.   
  
"I heard there was some kind of disruption," a new voice said, sounding vaguely familiar to Minseok. Minseok didn't turn around, embarrassed to be seen with the after-effects of crying.   
  
"Baba, don't worry. I took care of it," the waiter replied.  
  
"Alright then, Yixing. You should get back to work then..." The other voice trailed off. "Minseok?"  
  
Minseok blinked as he recognised the waiter's name and his own. He turned around, only to be met with a face he hadn't seen in ten years.  
  
"Junmyeon?"  
  
xXx  
  
"Here." Junmyeon offered Minseok a glass of water as they sat in his office, Kyungsoo sitting next to his father as Junmyeon sat opposite them.  
  
It turned out that Junmyeon had been promoted to manager of the restaurant a few years ago, and Yixing, the child Minseok used to babysit who was now twenty-two, was working part-time in his father's restaurant whilst studying in university. Junmyeon's other son, who was Yifan's age, was in high school still.  
  
"Thank you," Minseok said gratefully, taking the cup and drinking it quickly. "I wish I could stay and catch up, but I need to go home." Minseok set the cup down on Junmyeon's desk and stood up.  _'I need to know that Yifan is okay.'_  
  
Junmyeon nodded in understanding. "Here, take my number, Minseok. I missed talking to you," he said, a smile on his lips.  
  
Minseok returned it, taking the man's hand and shaking it. "Me too," he said, taking the offered piece of paper from the man and bowing politely, taking his leave with his son.  
  
They left through the back door of Junmyeon's office and through the employee's route, and quickly took the bus, Minseok anxious to get home.  
  
"Mama?" Kyungsoo looked up at his father as they sat in the rocky bus, a few stops from home. "Is Yifan-hyung okay?"  
  
Minseok sighed. "I hope so, peanut."  
  
xXx  
  
"Yifan-ah? Baby?" Minseok called as he stepped into their flat, switching the lights on. He looked to the shoe rack, indicating that Yifan was home, and the raven sighed in relief.   
  
As they walked into their home, they saw Yifan sat on the couch staring at something rather intently, his eyebrows drawn into a dark expression. He made no indication as to whether he had heard them enter or not, but both Minseok and Kyungsoo were quiet anyway.  
  
Minseok then turned to his youngest and said softly, "Soo, it's late, so go to your room and get ready for bedtime, please." The child did as was asked, scared by the deafeningly silent atmosphere that was engulfing the room.  
  
When the bedroom door was shut, Minseok slowly made his way over to sit next to Yifan, but the teen shifted away.  
  
Minseok winced, feeling his stomach drop. "...Yifan?"  
  
"Why didn't you tell me about these pictures?" Yifan said, voice a low tremor. In his hands were the pictures that Luhan had shamelessly mentioned in front of many diners and waiters.   
  
It was very incriminating to look at - photos of a half-naked and sleeping twenty-nine-year-old Minseok in a bed with a man around the age of forty. Some were very obviously sexual, despite it being taken from outside and through a window.  
  
"I..." Minseok struggled to speak. How could he say that no matter what he could say from his point of view, he would never be believed because of those photos? That he was scared that if he showed them to Yifan, he would lose his son?  
  
"All this time you made me think you were innocent?" Yifan hissed, turning his eyes towards his father. His eyes were red, as though he had been crying.  
  
Minseok couldn't help but feel sick. "I didn't- Yifan, I never made you think I was innocent-"  
  
"You never told me either!" Yifan yelled, hands crumpling the pictures in anger. "You never told me why Baba divorced you in the first place! You just let me assume things- that Baba left us and it was all his fault!"  
  
"-Yifan-"  
  
"But it was never his fault, was it?" Yifan shouted.  
  
Minseok choked as the tears began to run. "-Yifan, please, just listen-"  
  
"Was it?!"  
  
"-It wasn't his fault, but-"  
  
"I bet Kyungsoo isn't even Baba's, is he?" Yifan yelled again, tears running down his cheeks.  
  
Minseok sobbed, unable to keep his emotions at bay. "Yifan, that's not true-"  
  
"I bet he's the son of that stupid old boss that you fooled around with when you had a husband waiting for you!" Yifan cried out loud, standing up from the couch. "You know I hate cheating, and that fact that my own father did it makes me sick! Baba was right to leave you!" The teenager screamed, hastily wiping the falling tears from his face. "I hate you for driving Baba away! I hate you for not telling me the truth! I HATE YOU!" He stormed from sitting room and into his shared bedroom, slamming the door shut despite Kyungsoo most likely being asleep.  
  
It seemed no one would be getting any sleep that night.  
  
xXx  
  
Minseok slid down from his seat and onto the floor as he watched his son leave, curling around himself as he cried, heart breaking as he heard the words replay in his head over and over and over.  
  
I hate you.  
  
_I hate you._  
  
**_I hate you._**  
  
Minseok leaned his face against the cushion of the couch, tears trailing messily down his face as he kept sobbing, everything in his body hurting from the emotional pain.  
  
He deserved every bit of the hatred from his son, but it didn't hurt any less. He knew that when Yifan found out eventually, he would believe that same story that Luhan had, and it hurt because it  _wasn't true,_  but every implication, every proof, showed the opposite. It hurt because even though it was the truth, no one would believe that he had been drugged after a long night at the office, was simply brought to his sleazy boss' house and moved around into those positions by the man, and that the photographer was actually hired by the boss himself. It hurt because this was the way the boss planned to break his and Luhan's marriage and it  _worked._ It hurt because that was the truth but he had no proof at all, so he would forever be known as a liar if he tried to explain it like he tried to explain it to Luhan. It hurt because he loved the younger man, and he loved his sons, but now his eldest despised him like his Luhan hated him.  
  
It hurt so much, and he couldn't bear it if his younger son ended up completely hating him too.  
  
"Mama?" A tiny voice called out.  
  
Minseok gasped and tried to hold in his sobs. "Yes peanut?"  
  
"Mama, is what hyung said true?" A small whimper sounded.  
  
Minseok let out a little choked cry; his younger son had heard everything. "It's what everyone believes," he responded hoarsely, not trying to deny it. He had already held the truth from his oldest and it backfired; he wasn't going to do it again to his youngest, even if the child ended up being disgusted with him too.  
  
Kyungsoo stepped out and approached his father, eyes sparkling with tears. "Do you hate me, Mama?"  
  
Minseok shook his head furiously. "Peanut, no, of course not. I could never hate my own child. Why would you ask that?"  
  
Kyungsoo let out a tiny sob and threw himself into Minseok's arms, letting the man pet his soft locks. "Because Yifan-hyung said I wasn't Baba's son. I don't have the same baba as Yifan-hyung?"  
  
"That's not true. You are your baba's son. You and Yifan have the same father, peanut. And even if you didn't, I would love you anyway." Minseok hugged his child fiercely, tears flowing. "I love you, peanut. Mama will always, always, love you."  
  
Kyungsoo clung back, hiding his tears in his father's shirt. "I love you too, Mama."  
  
Minseok's breath stuttered, the relief overweighing the pain.  
  
Maybe he wouldn't get much sleep, but he could rest easier knowing that at least his youngest didn't hate him.  
  
xXx  
  
"Yifan-ah?" Minseok knocked on the bedroom door, something he never usually did.  
  
He and Kyungsoo had fallen asleep in the sitting room, the latter unwilling to part with his father and the former having no energy to move them into his room or get undressed.   
  
Yifan opened the door, bleary-eyed with scruffy clothes, and stared at his father before brushing past the other and heading for the kitchen. No 'morning, Appa,' or 'I'm still trying to sleep, Appa.' Minseok felt his hands drop dejectedly, but tried to clear the disheartening feeling and headed towards the kitchen instead.  
  
Kyungsoo was already seated and eating his breakfast cereal with Yifan grabbing making some toast and ignoring the food that Minseok had made specially for the teen.  
  
"Yifan? Do you want this?" Minseok pointed at the cooked food on the plate.  
  
Yifan shook his head and went back to his toast, munching it rather quickly for someone who just woke up. He finished in the space of fifteen minutes and hurriedly got up to leave.  
  
Minseok tried again, grabbing Yifan's wrist as he tried to leave. "Baby, do you want anything for school today?"  
  
Yifan turned and pulled his arm away from his father's grasp. "What will it take for you to get the hint? I don't want to talk to you right now, Appa."   
  
The teen left with a few strides, leaving Minseok standing there and watching, heart breaking as he watched his son slowly pull away from him, step by step.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, um, enjoy and comment?


	4. Chapter 3: Hurting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Misunderstandings suck.
> 
> ~
> 
> "Kids ain't supposed to be grateful. They're supposed to eat your food and break your heart." _Bobby Singer, Supernatural_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On a completely unrelated note, I watched Unforgettable (Pure Love) - yes the one with Soo in it - and I cried a little bit.  
> Okay, I lie. I cried a lot. So good but so sad. ㅠㅡㅠ  
> 

The stifling atmosphere continued on for days, even drowning Kyungsoo's cheery persona to the point where the child couldn't bring himself to smile anymore.  
  
For Yifan, it was a case of ignoring his father and simply making a few monotonous nods towards the man. He would wake up and leave early for school, and when he came back late he would lock himself in the shared bedroom, forcing Kyungsoo to temporarily sleep in his father's smaller room. The teen couldn't bring himself to look at the man he believed to have taken away his baba from his life. There was no other way around it; that was what had happened, and all the proof needed was there.  
  
For Minseok, it was exhausting and painful. Exhausting, working the same jobs every week as usual, along with the stress of knowing that his son refused to look at him, let alone speak to him. Painful because his son hated him for reasons that were understandable but in this case, were taken from fabricated proofs and lies.   
  
And yet, Minseok felt he deserved it. Even though the photos were staged, it hadn't stopped him from going out for a friendly drink with his 'kind' boss after his exhausting shift at work. It turned out his boss wasn't so kind, but in fact greedy for companionship with a taken man. It hadn't stopped him from confronting his boss about his behaviour, disguising the talk with a dinner with Yifan, only to be caught by Luhan.  
  
Minseok sighed, eyes downcast. Everything was going downhill so fast that he didn't know if he could keep up with it, or crash and burn. He just had to trust that eventually his son would talk to him, even if it were only to tolerate him. If not, he could do the teenager a favour and give him a chance to do what he always wanted to do despite saying he never wanted to - let him move in with Luhan. It would be like tearing a part off his already torn soul, but if Yifan really couldn't look at him in the face, then the least he could do was provide an escape for the teenager.   
  
Sure, he'd be parting with the teenager sooner than he hoped, and on terrible terms, but at the least his son would be happy. _'Happier than he is now,'_ Minseok thought, a tear leaking inconspicuously from his eye. _'All I want are my sons to be happy. If Yifan isn't happy living with me anymore, then it's really is for the best. Forget about how you feel, Minseok. This is about putting your sons first. Happy and healthy, remember that. Happy and healthy.'_  
  
xXx  
  
"Yifan-hyung?" A voice called out.  
  
"Chanyeol," Yifan said, surprised by the call of his name. Usually, his heart would start speeding up at the sight of his friend and secret crush, but he wasn't in the best mood.  
  
He had seen the painful look on his father's face as he left without looking, speaking or interacting with the man again for the last two weeks. It pained him to see his father look so hurt, but the other part of him didn't care, because the man had led him to believe a lie for at least most of his life. His baba was right; his appa wasn't perfect. But never did he think that his appa was capable of that.  
  
"Hyung?"  
  
Yifan blinked, seeing Chanyeol's worried face.  
  
"Are you okay?" The younger asked, placing a hand in his shoulder. "Do you want to talk?"  
  
"I..." Yifan hesitated, before making a half-hearted joke. “You’re never this serious. What happened to the Happy Virus?”  
  
"Hyung, please. If it's bothering you, talk to me," Chanyeol said, gazing at the other worriedly. “I can’t be the Happy Virus if my friend is upset.”  
  
Yifan sighed. "…Can we go somewhere more private?"   
  
Chanyeol nodded and led them to the back of the science block, where rarely anyone went past because of the shortcut in front of the maths block. They sat down on the grass area, sun still shining and both aware they were skipping class, but not particularly fussed.  
  
"So, what's bugging you?" Chanyeol asked, concern shining in his eyes. It was strange for Yifan to see such a different emotion in his friend’s eyes that wasn’t joy and laughter.  
  
Yifan calmed his beating heart and spoke, getting right to it. "You know that restaurant outing I told you about? Well, I found out that the reason my parents divorced was because Appa really did cheat on Baba. All this time, I thought that Baba had misunderstood things and Appa had been wrongly accused. I thought Baba had broken things off selfishly. But then I found out about the pictures of Appa and his old boss, and suddenly I felt like I was drowning. All this time, Appa had withheld the truth from me. When I found out, I kind of lashed out, and I haven't properly spoken to him since." He didn't mention the daunting thought that his little brother might only be his half-brother from an affair.  
  
Chanyeol sighed. "That sounds really... complicated. I get how upset you must feel though. I felt a lot like that when my parents nearly divorced for similar reasons."  
  
"They did?" Yifan asked curiously. "I didn't know that. You never said anything."  
  
"It was a while ago; back when we were thirteen or fourteen, I think. I didn't speak about it because I didn't want to bother you or anyone else, and honestly, I wanted to pretend it wasn't happening. I wish I did though; it would have helped. But well, it's over and done with," Chanyeol shrugged. "They pulled through it eventually, my parents, and the story turned out to be false. Baba was out with a woman once and the business gossip vine blew it all up because he had just become the owner of a rich restaurant. Appa got rather upset about it after he saw a picture from one of the socialites and they had a huge fight for months. It was horrible." Chanyeol ran a hand through his wavy hair. "I hated them for all the fighting. Hyung was more reserved about it, but I could tell he was upset too, being all distant and a recluse. Once they had cleared it all up, it was a lot better. Actually, I think they renew their vows again afterwards," Chanyeol said, chuckling to himself. "But, I still resented Baba after all of that, and for being the cause of Appa's pain. Yixing-hyung forgave Baba straight away, but I couldn't. Not for a while - not after what I had seen what he had put Appa through, regardless of the real truth. I eventually forgave him, but it took some time. Still I got there in the end, because I love my baba, even if he made the mistake to dine with a single woman in public and lead the gossips into spreading false accusations." Chanyeol cleared his throat after his long story. "I guess what I'm trying to get at is, do you still love your appa?"  
  
"Of course I do," Yifan said without hesitation.   
  
"Then you're one step closer to forgiving him. Whether you like it or not, he's still the one who gave birth to you, and he still is a human who makes mistakes. Yes, you can be angry, but don't let that alienate you from him. He's probably feeling terrible about not telling you. I know I hurt my baba a lot by simply ignoring him for weeks," Chanyeol said. "I remember seeing him break down in Appa's arms once, saying that I hated him. It made me feel like crap for everything because even though I was angry, I still I loved him. I ended up walking into that room and telling him that I could never hate him because he meant a lot to me. It was a pretty bad situation at the time, but we managed make it work out for the better."  
  
Yifan paled as Chanyeol spoke, reminded of all the mean words and actions he had said and done over the last two weeks.  
  
Chanyeol noticed the look. "What is it?"  
  
"I've been so horrible to Appa," Yifan whispered, feeling the sudden, overwhelming guilt. "I told him that I hated him - I've never said that to him in my life. I don't even speak to him, look at him, or sometimes acknowledge him anymore." Yifan swallowed thickly, his heart aching painfully. "God, I'm a horrible person, Chanyeol. I was so angry at him, but... I bet Appa has been crying secretly in his room because of me! I..."  
  
Chanyeol wrapped his arms around the upset teen. "What you said was an impulsive mistake, hyung, but you can fix that; I know you can. From what I've heard from you, your appa loves you. He'll forgive you for whatever you do. Just promise you'll try to fix it you get home, and talk to him. You'll make him feel much better, and yourself."  
  
Yifan took in a deep breath as he looked up at his friend and crush. "I promise," he said, before leaning closer. "Thank you for listening to me and knocking some sense in too, Chanyeol. Despite being such a goofball, you give some good advice." Without thinking, he leaned in more and kissed the younger teen, hand wrapping around the younger's neck automatically.  
  
Yifan pulled back in surprise when he realised what he just did and broke the kiss, ready to run, but Chanyeol held him firmly seated with two hands on the elder's shoulders. "It's okay, hyung. I wanted that to. Granted, this wasn't the ideal moment, but whatever." He laughed, brushing his thumb against the elder's cheek. "Go out with me?"  
  
Yifan nodded before he even realised he was, a grin on his face. "I thought you'd never ask."  
  
xXx  
  
"Soo? Appa? Are you home?" Yifan called as he took of his shoes in the hallway. He walked into the sitting room, only to find his appa sitting across the room from his baba, before speaking in hushed tones and unaware of another presence.  
  
"Appa?" Yifan said again, gaining the attention of both his parents. He winced internally when he saw the surprise on his father's face melting into a tentative smile. _'Why had I let my anger make me ignore my appa for so long? Now Appa's so used to me ignoring him that a simple call of his name would make him smile.'_ It made Yifan's stomach churn with guilt, but he shoved it down.  
  
"Y-Yifan!" Minseok said nervously. He was shocked at being called out by his son, having got used to being ignored for the past two weeks. It was good to know that he was wearing down on the teen. It was a bit late to make any more progress, though. "Your baba and I have been discussing something together."  
  
"We were wondering if you would like to live at my house," Luhan said. "Not forever, of course. Just for four months. You know, so we can get to know each other better, and you can get to know your step-father and half-brother too."  
  
"I..." Yifan looked at his appa. "What about school? And is that okay?"  
  
Minseok smiled. "Of course it is, Yifan. It would be nice to get to know your baba, right? And your school is closer to your baba's than here."  
  
Yifan nodded. "Oh okay. Yeah, of course." He looked at the blonde male. "When do I leave?"  
  
"Tomorrow morning," Luhan said.  
  
_'So soon?'_ Yifan thought. He nodded in agreement anyway. He would do his appa a favour and get to know his baba. It was what his appa wanted from him before, and if he was going to start making it up to his appa, he was going to do this for him too, although he was a lot less reluctant this time. "Alright. I should start packing, shouldn’t I?"  
  
"Yeah. I'm pick you up tomorrow at 10am, since it's a Saturday," Luhan said, getting up. "I should go - it's getting late. I'll see you tomorrow, Yifan-ah, Minseok," the man said, smiling as he bowed and left the flat.   
  
Minseok got up as Yifan started to walk to his room to start packing. "Do you... want help with that?" The older man offered.  
  
Yifan waved his father off dismissively, not wanting to put more work on top of his appa. His appa needed his rest, after all he had put him through, and plus work as usual. "Nah, it's okay, Appa. I can do this myself. Oh, and what about Soo? Does he know? Is he okay?"  
  
"Soo was here when we were discussing it, but went to sleep in your room because he was tired. He was really upset, thinking you might miss his birthday, but I told him you could visit and vice versa, and that you would make it back in time for his birthday anyway, so he wasn't as sad, but he was still crying a lot."  
  
"And you, Appa?" _'Are you okay?'_  
  
"Hm? I'm fine, Yifan-ah. And don't worry about the next few months; you'll be alright there." Minseok smiled again, but it looked odd in Yifan's eyes.  
  
Yifan blinked, sensing something strange about his appa but not brave enough to mention it. "Alright, Appa. I'm going to start, but I'll come out for dinner."  
  
Minseok nodded as Yifan entered his room and shut the door behind gently as to not wake his sleeping brother next door. As he pulled out his spare suitcase, he thought he heard a small sob from his father's room, but dismissed it as his imagination.  
  
xXx  
  
The next day saw the family of three waiting outside for Yifan's ride to his new home for the next four months.  
  
"You all ready, Yifan?" Minseok asked gently.  
  
There was still that awkward tension between the two, and being somewhat opposites of each other didn't help. Minseok was the type to apologise through gentle words and big actions, and sometimes he would take it to the point were he would end up hurting himself emotionally. Yifan didn't know how to apologise with direct words and relied on hidden meanings to get his apologies across.  
  
It was a messy combination as Minseok got his point across as clear as it could be without the actual words, but Yifan didn't because the father was too absorbed in apologising to understand that his son was also apologising. Of course, Yifan had too much pride (and cowardice) in himself to apologise with the straightforward words, so it all felt particularly one-sided.  
  
"Yeah, Appa," Yifan said, standing outside the apartment with his appa, a tired Kyungsoo being carried by the father. He stole a glance at his appa who looked rather nervous and worried. Maybe because the man didn't know if his son would play nice with his baba, despite having a new outlook on the man. "I'll be nice to Baba and his husband. Oh, and my half-brother too."  
  
"I'm not worried about that, Yifan-ah," Minseok replied. He didn't want to say it, but he was just too scared to be separate from his son. They hadn't made up, not really, and to know that his son still held resentment towards him despite actually talking to him a bit more, made him feel a little ill. He was not going to see his son regularly for the next four months, and it frightened him.  
  
Also, that small, steadily-growing fear in his heart told him that his eldest might not return after four months because he loved living with his baba more than with his appa. Minseok couldn't blame him if that did happen because who would choose to live in a small flat and an always busy, always tired and lying father when he could have a nice, happy family with his other father?  
  
Still, he wasn't sure if he could handle the painful rejection of his own son when the time came.  
  
Swallowing the burning feeling, Minseok smiled as genuinely as he could manage. "I'm just worried about how Kyungsoo is going be," Minseok said, peering down at his youngest, whose sleeping eyes were still sore. The child had been bawling into the sheets all afternoon and night after he was told, and only when Kyungsoo had fallen asleep, did Minseok let his own silent tears fall.  
  
Yifan frowned, coming closer to kiss Kyungsoo's restless head. "Don't worry, Soo. I'll visit, okay?" He brushed his baby brother's cheek gently before taking a comfortable step back from his father.  
  
Minseok opened his mouth to say something, only for a sleek black car with tinted windows to pull up in front of them. The door swung open, Luhan appearing from behind the door.  
  
"Got all your belongings, Yifan-ah?" Luhan asked as he stepped out the car.  
  
Yifan nodded. "Yeah. I have everything." He lugged his suitcase into the boot of the car that his baba had opened, too distracted by his heavy lifting to notice his baba approach his appa.  
  
"Thanks for letting Yifan stay for a few months, Minseok," Luhan said sincerely. "It means a lot to me."  
  
Minseok smiled weakly. Hearing Luhan thank him after years of separation was something he was not used to. He almost preferred it when the latter was angry or refused to speak to him, like it had been for the past ten years, for it held him back from loving the man any further than he already did. This sincerity just made him yearn to hold the younger in his arms and never let go, but he knew he couldn't. Their time was over, and he needed to remember that.  
  
"It's fine. Just... look after him as much as you can, okay?" Minseok said. _'Look after him if he decides he doesn't want to come back, please. And make our oldest son happy; something I failed to do.'_  
  
"Of course," Luhan replied, looking over at their grown-up son. "I'll do my best." He called over to the teenager, "Are you ready?" Yifan nodded in reply as Luhan turned back to Minseok. "I'll let you say your goodbyes," he said, climbing back into the car and shutting the door for some privacy.  
  
Yifan came over to his appa and brother as Minseok gently woke Kyungsoo. "Peanut? It's time to say bye to hyung."  
  
Kyungsoo whined as he opened his tired eyes. "Hyung..." The younger made grabby hands for his older brother, who accepted without complaint and carried the boy. "Hyung, I'll miss you," the younger boy said, his eyes sad and droopy.  
  
Yifan felt tears gather in the corner of his eyes, but didn't let them fall. "I'll miss you too, Soo. Don't worry; I'll visit you when I can. And, I'll be back after four months, so wait for me okay, Soo?" He rubbed his brother's back before put him down on the child's own two feet.  
  
Yifan then turned to his appa, the tension suddenly spiking again. He bit his lip and looked at his father's face, knowing that whatever his appa was feeling, he was hiding it well. "Appa," he said hesitantly. He knew that his father had been trying to make it up to him for about the last two weeks, and he had brushed him off like a fly. He knew that he had hurt his father, and he also knew that his father didn't know that he had forgiven him the day that Chanyeol had spoken to him about it. He also knew that he needed to stop being a coward and just say it because his father was sometimes dense about these sorts of things. "Appa, I need to say something. I... I don't like the fact that you didn't tell me the truth, but I still-"  
  
"-Yifan-ah, it's okay," Minseok said, cutting his son off gently. He didn't want to hear from his own son's mouth that he still couldn't forgive him for the truth he had withheld. He didn't want to hear that his son still resented him. He didn't want to hear it in fear of breaking down in front of his sons and former husband. No one should have to witness a pathetic mess like that. "I know."  
  
"You do?" Yifan's eyes widened hopefully. _'You know that I still love you? That I'm sorry I said I hated you? That I'm so sorry for everything I said?'_  
  
"Yeah, I do," Minseok said, breathing deeply. He swallowed again, looking at his precious son. "Have fun at your baba's, okay? And work hard in school too," he finally said. "I'll miss you."  
  
Yifan nodded, afraid that if he spoke, he'd cry.  
  
Minseok stepped closer, wanting to pull his son into a tight hug, but he didn't think he'd appreciate that with how their relationship was, nor a kiss on the cheek. He decided to settle for a ruffle of his son's black hair, before patting the teenager's back in the direction of the car, not wanting to keep Luhan waiting. "See you in four months, baby." _'Appa will always love you, Yifan. No matter how you feel about me.'_  
  
xXx  
  
As the car drove off down the road, Yifan looked at his disappearing father and brother longingly and in mild confusion. Usually his appa would send him off with a kiss or a hug, but neither of those things had happened. Glancing at his baba, Yifan saw the male smile warmly at him from the front mirror, making him smile back.  
  
_'He probably did that so that I didn't look childish in front of Baba,'_ Yifan thought. _'That was nice of him.'_  
  
He leaned back and relaxed for the journey, ignoring the small part of his brain bugging him that his appa looked like he was going to cry as he watched him leave, and that maybe everything wasn't okay, and that maybe, he shouldn't have left the way he did.


	5. Chapter 4: Conflict

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yifan learns some new information. Good and bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Excuse any typos please. I'll fix them when I get round to it :)
> 
> Oh and, happy birthday Luhannie! (づ￣ ³￣)づ

Four months had flown by quickly for Yifan, and it was truly an enjoyable experience, despite his slight doubts beforehand.  
  
He enjoyed playing with Baekhyun during his stay, as his half-brother was absolutely adorable, almost as much as Kyungsoo, which was saying something because that boy was just so squishy in Yifan eyes. Baekhyun was more of an energetic bean sprout; why he came up with that description, Yifan didn't know, but his youngest brother was super small and super adorable.  
  
Baekhyun was shy too, and pretty similar to Kyungsoo, only more hyper and _very_ talkative once he got to know the person, but he wasn't the touchy-feely kind of person like Kyungsoo was. It was strange to not have a smaller body constantly tackling him after coming back from school, but it just meant less backaches. It wasn’t that he didn't like it when his squishy brother showered affection all over him, but he did tend to wake with a sore back after some really hard tackles.  
  
Also, despite his wariness, Yifan had come to love his stepfather as much as his own carrier father, although more like an older brother than anything else. Sehun (or Sehun-hyung, as he preferred to be called - he was only 30, after all) was as kind and as caring to him as he was to his own son, and it warmed his heart to see the older man scare off the petty bullies in his school (bullies he hadn't told anyone about, especially his parents or his best-friend-slash-boyfriend) whenever the man occasionally came to collect him from school by car. It also helped that he would join the teenager in pranking his baba whenever he was feeling bored. Last time, the two had managed to hide some of Luhan's hideous articles of clothing - something that, apparently, Sehun had wanted to burn for the past three years.   
  
His father was definitely a figure Yifan didn't expect either. The man made sure he didn't bunk off school to work, instead insisting that he studied hard so he could get a better job by getting good grades, which could possibly lead to a good university if he wanted. He checked that the teen was doing well socially and hanging out with the right crowd, and gave him a curfew like any other teenager. Things like this made Yifan a little annoyed, of course, but it also showed him how much his baba was trying to a be a responsible father to him, and it felt wonderful. The man even played along with his pranks, not the least bit angry, if only because the pranks were actually pretty tame anyway. Yifan liked how close he was getting with his other family, and it made him feel a little sad that he could have had it sooner if he had stopped resenting his baba earlier.   
  
What Yifan was experiencing was good and he didn't want to let it go. It almost made him not want to leave this new family he had discovered, but he remembered that he still had his family waiting for him to come home, and it made him feel a little conflicted.  
  
That being said, Yifan hadn't seen either his appa or brother, being preoccupied with his studies, developing his growing relationship with Chanyeol, and just being very busy in general getting to know his other side of the family. The visits he promised didn't happen simply because the schedules between the two families were clashing or there was just wasn't enough time, since they live quite far from each other, and the phone calls weren’t enough to satisfy him. He knew that they had called a few times, but some of the time he was either out or very busy with the new material from his school subjects that were piling up. More often than not, he did manage to have nice, long conversations that lasted three hours at the least, but it would always end with Kyungsoo sounding sad about having to put the phone down. He knew Kyungsoo was possibly very upset with him from not visiting, but he also knew that the latter would forgive him after he spent some long-needed bonding time once he came back. For Yifan, it was tough feeling a little homesick, but he found it was also experience for when he would finally go to university too, something he wanted to do and would achieve, if his increasing grades were any indication.  
  
As for his appa... Well, Yifan had learnt something that could make or break his father. It turned out that there was a lot more to his parent's story and it would have all sounded like one terrible romance novel if it weren’t the truth behind the people in his life.  
  
For one, his baba and his stepfather didn't even love each other. Not in the same way his parents had loved each other, anyway. A few days after he had moved in, he noticed that the married couple were so distant in terms of romantic affections, and he asked why. His baba had sat him down after looking at Sehun for help, and they told him everything; four months after the picture scandal and divorce, his baba had got heavily drunk and had a one-night stand with Sehun, which resulted in a child. His baba wanted to take responsibility and under no circumstances would let Sehun raise it alone. They got married to give familial support to their child and became rather close, but as good friends, not lovers.  
  
After all, Sehun still had his heart held by a man who had suddenly vanished from his life, and his baba... still loved his appa.  
  
When Yifan was told this (with a stern reminder about never telling his appa about the conversation), he was still surprised, and was about to ask how, but then he remembered his appa's words from before.   
  
_We don't choose who we fall in love with, Yifan. Sometimes it just happens, and you can try to move on when it doesn't work out, but there will always be that little part of you that loves that person._  
  
After that revelation, it was all Yifan could think about. Both his parents still loved each other, even after ten years of being divorced and being hurt by each other. He wasn't sure about whether bringing his parents together would be a good idea or not, though - both still had scars to completely close, neither aware that their love was still close to mutual (except for himself), and what about his stepfather and youngest brother? What would happen to them? Would they both have to leave so that his appa and baba could live together again?  
  
He selfishly wanted his parents to be together, but at the same time, would it make them happy? Did they truly love each other enough? Would it destroy other people in the process?  
  
Yifan wasn't sure, and that was what kept his mouth shut.  
  
"Yifan-hyung?" A high voice called, making the teen turn around. When the parents were busy with work, Yifan was tasked with picking up his younger brother from school once his baba and hyung found out that he would always finish in time to reach Baekhyun's school. They even gave him pocket money for looking after Baekhyun until they got home instead of getting their usual babysitter, and today had been one of those days.  
  
"Baek, what is it?" Yifan said, smiling at his youngest brother. He patted the space next to him on the couch, telling the child to sit down.  
  
Baekhyun sat down and hummed before speaking. "What is Kyungsoo-hyung like?"  
  
Yifan blinked. "That's really random, Baek. Why are you asking?"  
  
"Well, he's your brother, so that makes him my brother too," the ten year old said simply. "And I want to know about him."  
  
Yifan smiled. "Well, Soo's a bit like you, I suppose, only less outgoing. He's shy in public, but when he's at home he can be a hyper owl; he likes to jump off the bed and pretend he can fly. He smiles a lot, even though he can be a little introverted. He warms up to you eventually if he likes you, and that's when you get to see all the squishiness he possesses." Yifan laughed, only to be reminded that he hadn't seen his brother in a while.  
  
"Yifan-hyung, do you miss your appa and brother?" Baekhyun asked curiously.  
  
"Yeah, I do," Yifan admitted. Truthfully, he missed his appa and brother a lot. It felt weird to not see them everyday, especially having not seen them in four months.  
  
"Are you going back to them?" Baekhyun asked, his voice sounding a little dejected and not himself. "Can't you stay here instead?" He continued, and his eyes started shimmering with tears.  
  
Yifan blinked at the change. "Baek..." He gathered his younger brother into his arms, letting the other cling to him.  
  
"Yifan-hyung, please stay. It's so lonely at home when Baba and Umma are working late, and I have to stay with a babysitter instead. I don't have any other friends at school either. They don't like me because I'm annoying and loud," Baekhyun cried into Yifan's shirt.  
  
"Oh, Baek. You are not annoying; you're a lovely person and I'm sure you'll find someone who likes you for who you are in school. And if you don't, you'll still have me, and Soo when you meet him." Yifan gently rubbed Baekhyun's back. "Besides, you know I can't stay here forever, Baek. I can't leave my appa and brother alone. What would you do if you had to choose? You wouldn't leave your baba and umma behind, would you?"  
  
Baekhyun shook his head. "Uh-uh. Umma always makes me these little packed lunches everyday and watches movies with me and plays with me if Baba can't. Baba likes to let me eat things Umma wouldn't let me eat normally."  
  
Yifan smiled. "See? I won't be able to have that from my appa if I stay here forever. Besides, it's Soo's birthday soon. He'll never forgive me if I missed it."  
  
Baekhyun wiped the tears with his sleeve and looked at his hyung. "It's going to be Kyungsoo-hyung's birthday?" He asked.  
  
Yifan nodded. "Yeah, in a week."  
  
"Can I come? If I'm allowed," Baekhyun asked hopefully. "I'll bring a present too!"  
  
Yifan grinned. "Of course. I'll ask Baba and hyung later. I'm sure they'll say yes," he replied, kissing Baekhyun's forehead.  
  
Baekhyun cuddled closer to Yifan, just sitting there in comfortable silence until Luhan and Sehun showed up to break the mood with their playful bickering. Yifan just laughed along with Baekhyun, watching at the sidelines. He was truly happy, even though a big part of him missed his other family too.   
  
He just wanted them all to be together and happy. Was that too much to ask for?  
  
xXx  
  
Hours later, the street lamps flickered on as footsteps approached, muffled only by the sounds of talking from the house. A loud knock on the door alerted the family of four to a presence outside. Yifan got up to open the door, wondering who it was as it was quite late already.  
  
"Is this Mr Lu Han's residence?" A young man in a suit asked when Yifan had opened the door. Next to the suit man was a taller police officer.  
  
Yifan nodded slowly. "Yes..." He turned his head, shouting down the hallway. "Baba! There's someone here for you!"  
  
Luhan made his way to where his son was, eyeing the professional-looking man and officer at the front door. "I'm Lu Han."  
  
The police officer stuck out his hand. "Kim Namjoon," the man said, shaking Luhan's hand respectfully. "Police officer."  
  
"And I'm Park Jimin, Mr Kim Minseok's social worker," said the slightly shorter male, also shaking Luhan's hand.  
  
Luhan's eyes widened slightly. "Is this about Yifan? Because my ex-husband and I had already sorted out the paperwork for Yifan to live here for four months. He's still got a week left."  
  
Jimin shook his head. "No, that's all fine. It's not about Yifan, actually. It's about Kim Kyungsoo."  
  
Yifan made a worried sound. "What? Is he okay? Is he hurt?"  
  
"Don't worry, Kyungsoo-ah is fine," Namjoon assured the teen. "Unfortunately, this is actually also about Mr Kim Minseok." Namjoon turned to Yifan. "I'm assuming you are Lu Yifan, correct?" Yifan nodded silently as Namjoon sighed. "Today, about 4:45pm, Mr Kim Minseok was caught in a hit-and-run accident. He did not come and pick up his son from school as he usually did, and neither did he pick up the phone calls, so the school was forced to call social services. He was brought to the orphanage to stay for a few hours whilst Jimin here went through records to find the closest family member to bring him to."  
  
Yifan choked as the words 'hit-and-run' looped in his mind. "Is my appa... Is he alive?" He asked, looking pale.  
  
Namjoon responded. "As far as I know, he's still in surgery." He shook his head. "I'm sorry, I don't know anymore than that."  
  
Luhan let out a shaky breath before speaking. "So why did you bring Kyungsoo here? Surely you're not going to make Yifan his temporary legal guardian?" He shook his head. "If anything, I'll take over being his temporary legal guardian. Yifan's too young."  
  
"Well actually, Yifan was our only choice as Kim Minseok had not written down any other relatives down, and unfortunately, we cannot legally allow anyone to become a minor's guardian without blood relation or permission from the current legal guardian. However, we did find Kyungsoo's biological father on his birth records," Jimin said. "Mr Lu, do you know that you're Kim Kyungsoo's biological father?"  
  
Luhan nearly collapsed in shock. "Wait, what?"  
  
Jimin looked at the man with sympathy. "Kim Kyungsoo is your biological son. We found papers showing that Mr Kim had done a DNA test matching Kyungsoo's DNA with Yifan's DNA as proof for the hospital to write your name down as Kyungsoo's biological father."  
  
"I... I..." Luhan stuttered, still trying to process the information. He let a deep breath out, trying to control his words. "Where is Kyungsoo?"  
  
Jimin made his way to the police car and carried a quiet Kyungsoo out. The child look exhausted, hands rubbing his eyes constantly as he sniffled. "Hey, Kyungsoo-ah," Jimin cooed softly, tapping the child's cheek. "We've brought you here to your brother and your baba."  
  
Kyungsoo shook his furiously. "I don't want to be here! I want Mama!"  
  
Namjoon rubbed the child's back, his actions soft despite his demeanour and stature. "Kyungsoo-ah, you need to let your mama get healthy in hospital. But, since you can't stay alone, you have to stay here with your brother. That's nice, right?"  
  
Kyungsoo surprised everyone by shouting. "No! I don't want to stay with Yifan-hyung! I don't want to stay with Baba! I just want my mama!" Kyungsoo dropped his head and whimpered. "Mama..."  
  
Jimin shushed the bawling child as Namjoon turned the shocked pair at the door. "He's been mumbling that all through the car journey," the officer said. "Still, Kyungsoo is going to have to stay. We can't afford to send him to the orphanage when he has relatives to look after him."  
  
"Of course," Luhan said, nearly stuttering.  
  
"But- but, my appa!" Yifan cried out, his eyes prickling with tears. "I need to see him."  
  
Namjoon gestured to his car along with Jimin. "We can take you there, but you have to bring your car too; we can't fit everyone inside."  
  
Luhan nodded in a daze, calling Sehun to come to the front door. Sehun, luckily, was not as fazed as his husband clearly was, and talked to the two strangers before quickly getting the family car and putting Baekhyun inside. Jimin decided to ride with Sehun and Baekhyun while Luhan and his two eldest sons took the car with Namjoon.  
  
As the cars made their way to the hospital, the only thing running through Luhan's head was the same thought.  
  
_'Please be okay, Minseok. Please.'_  
  
xXx  
  
When they had arrived at the hospital and had checked in, Namjoon and Jimin both bid the family goodbye as they left in their car, leaving words of hope for the man in surgery.   
  
Kyungsoo was fast asleep on one of the waiting couches thanks to Sehun's special soup that he had packed beforehand and his soft, lulling touch. The male stroked the Kyungsoo’s hair softly as the child trembled every once in a while. A clueless Baekhyun sat next to his umma at one end of the large couch, watching the older child sleeping with concern on his face, wondering why the older was restless and why his eldest hyung was crying.  
  
"Yifan... Did you know?" Luhan asked quietly. He was sat at the other end of the couch and next to his eldest son, who had his head buried in his father's lap. Yifan had curled up next to his brother, his sniffling having started as soon as the officer and social worker had left. "About Kyungsoo's parentage?" He caressed Yifan's hair gently, patiently waiting for an answer. He could feel the bubbling anger at Minseok rising for not saying anything for ten years, but he felt more concern and fear and worry at that moment than anything else.  
  
"I did," Yifan nodded, eyes red as he sat up slowly. "But I didn't say anything after that whole fight with Appa because then I thought that maybe he wasn't really telling the truth and Soo was the child of his ex-boss." He choked on his tears. "Is Appa going to be okay?" Yifan, for all the show of being an independent teenager, was just as dependent on his appa for comfort and love now as he was as a young child. Now that he was faced in a situation where he could lose that, he didn't know what to do.  
  
"He's going to be fine, Yifan. You'll see," Luhan said, letting Yifan bury his face into his shoulder and letting him cry.  
  
Luhan glanced over at Sehun, who's gaze was worried. _'Are you okay?'_ Sehun mouthed at the other. Luhan's nod was minuscule, and moved his attention back to Yifan, who was trembling in his arms.  
  
A sudden noise erupted from the tiny body next to Sehun, startling the other occupants of the room. Kyungsoo raised his hands and gripped at thin air, whining sadly. "Mama... Mama..." Kyungsoo opened his eyes and whimpered more, upset to not see his mama in front of him. Yifan pulled away from his father to hug his brother, wanting comfort from the other as much as he wanted to also comfort the younger. He leaned over and gently pulled the waking child closer to himself, only for Kyungsoo to struggle in his arms.  
  
"Let go of me!" Kyungsoo screeched angrily, pushing away Yifan's desperate hands. "Let go!"  
  
"Soo, it's just Yifan-hyung," Yifan said hoarsely, worried to see his brother angry. His brother never got angry.  
  
"I don't care! You're a horrible person and I don't like you!"  
  
Yifan choked on his own words. "Soo, don't say that..."  
  
"Well it's true!" Kyungsoo yelled, big rolls of tears running down his cheeks. "You left me and Mama alone!"  
  
"It was only for four months..." Yifan whispered weakly.  
  
"You promised you would visit at least every week but I didn't even see you once!" Kyungsoo continued to shout. "Mama was always sad and cried everyday because you left us alone! If you didn't leave then maybe Mama wouldn't DIE!"  
  
Yifan sobbed loudly at Kyungsoo's words, making Baekhyun hide his face in his umma's shirt, wanting to cry because his hyung was crying.  
  
"Soo..." Yifan cried. "I'm sorry... Hyung is sorry..." He clung to Kyungsoo, who struggled again before going limp in his brother's embrace, too upset to move anymore.  
  
Luhan breathed deeply as his two elder sons held each other tightly, trying his best not to cry as well; cry in worry, in anger, in _fear_ because he could lose the man that hurt him so much, lied to him, but who he still loved after all this time.  
  
He was not okay.


	6. Chapter 5: Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little outlook on Luhan's POV and some more drama. Kinda.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait!
> 
> Unfortunately, the next wait might be longer :( 
> 
> I'm not sure how long it will be until the next update because I will be on holiday for a month after my exams and the internet there isn't great. Basically, I'll be writing for two months but unlikely to post anything until after I get back. At the very least, you'll get an update in August, but if I get some sort of internet, I'll try for July.

By the time the surgery had finished, it was early in the morning, and the sun had only just peeked through the hospital blinds and over the horizon, sunlight bathing Luhan and his family in their restless sleep.  
  
They had managed to sleep at the hospital overnight when Yifan refused to leave after visiting hours were over, watery eyes pleading the nurses and doctor to let him stay. It had worked, and they offered the family one spare bed in the maternity ward where the parents had placed Kyungsoo and Baekhyun to rest, while they and Yifan slept on the cushioned lounge chairs.  
  
It was the doctor who had woken both Luhan and Sehun, gently informing the couple that Minseok was currently sleeping, but that the surgery was successful and that he would be awake in a few hours, although they also informed them that the man would kept there for a week at least so that he could recover. Luhan paled a little when he found out that Minseok had suffered from a punctured lung and broken ribs, a broken leg, and a mild concussion, but thanked the doctor for saving the man with a tight handshake.  
  
It was only when the doctor left that Luhan let his strong posture drop, his head burying itself into Sehun's chest as he sobbed, letting the latter stroke his hair in his moment of weakness. The younger man gently guided himself and Luhan towards the chairs, pulling his husband closer as Luhan continued to cry.  
  
"Luhan...?" Sehun murmured quietly once the man had overcome his emotional breakdown. Luhan had not pulled away from Sehun's chest, but his tears had dried and he was no longer crying. "What are you going to do now?"  
  
"I don't know, Sehun," Luhan said, gripping the man's shirt for comfort. "Should I talk to him when wakes up? Or should we just leave with Yifan? But, what about Kyungsoo? I really don't know." He had unsure look on his face. "Sehun, what should I do?"  
  
"You should talk to him, Luhan," Sehun said, gently pushing Luhan away from his chest to face the older man. "You told me after your divorce with him, both of you never really settled the matter and just _talked_ , and it's been ten years, Luhan. Maybe this is the time. Even if it means that you break your heart again, at least this time you'll be able to move on without any regrets." He looked at the dawning sun peering through the windows. "I wish I could have that chance to settle some things as well."  
  
Luhan understood what Sehun was implying. "One day, I'm sure you'll get your chance too. I'll help you." He squeezed Sehun's hand in thanks before standing up. "I'm going to go downstairs for some coffee. Do you want me to get you anything?"  
  
Sehun shook his head and gestured to the sleeping kids. "Maybe later. I'll stay with the kids and call you if I want something."  
  
Luhan nodded and kissed Baekhyun and Yifan's foreheads, and before he could stop himself, Kyungsoo's as well. Giving Sehun a quick and reassuring smile, Luhan made his way downstairs to the coffee shop, immersing himself in his conflicting thoughts.  
  
It was only less than an hour later after sitting down in the corner of the shop, that Luhan had managed to down his third coffee, sighing again as he contemplated what kind of conversation he and Minseok would end up having once the older had woken up.  
  
The past times they had tried to meet up and talk, it had ended with both of them extremely angry at each other and Luhan more heartbroken than the last. It seemed to be a reoccurring theme with the two of them; they'd try to fix it, but they would only end up not speaking for a few months and Luhan hurting deeply, before Minseok would call again, asking for another talk, and then repeat. It was tiresome, and Luhan knew that one of these days, he was going to truly break. Seeing Minseok so close yet so far over the last ten years had made his heart yearn, yell and cry at exactly the same time, and he didn't know how he could get past it.  
  
The only time they had ever managed to have a decent conversation was when Minseok suggested that their eldest son stay at his house for a few months to really reconnect with him. It was a strange conversation, albeit a surprisingly pleasant one, because not once did their typical argument come up, but odd, however, because Minseok was not himself. It was subtle, but Luhan noticed that Minseok was more withdrawn and always searching for something. It made Luhan feel a tiny bit concerned, but he couldn't dwell on it when all he could think about was seeing his son properly after ten years.  
  
The last four months had made Luhan feel better than he ever felt in the last ten years, which was a lot. To have his eldest son back in his life was a miracle because he knew his son had resented him for leaving Minseok. Luhan hated himself for it too, but he also wasn't a pushover; he wasn't going to stay with someone who would cheat on him without regard for his feelings.  
  
What made it even worse though, was that Luhan never imagined in his life that Minseok would cheat. Before the divorce, it was inconceivable. Minseok was a kind, attentive and loving husband and father that would never think of cheating on him.   
  
At least, that's what Luhan thought.  
  
He could still remember when his entire being shattered after he had opened the envelope containing pictures of his loyal husband with another man in bed, both dishevelled and looking like they had devoured each other. He was at work then, and he wasn't even allowed to destroy his office because the chairman from another company had been due to arrive in the following hour.   
  
Needless to say, only when he had arrived at home did he throw something - something being a framed picture of him and Minseok at the beach as college students that sat on top of the TV in the sitting room - letting the glass shatter and scatter across the flooring. It had startled Minseok, who had heard the crash from the kitchen, and brought him into the other room to find Luhan staring at him like he was a completely different person.  
  
The following events after that were almost a blur to Luhan, having decided that he never wanted to remember what had happened then. All he could recall was storming out of the house, leaving Minseok curled up against the wall, unharmed but crying, and Yifan, who had heard the shouts, trembling and sobbing at the doorway of his room with his stuffed alpaca in his hand.  
  
Running a hand over his face, Luhan sighed into his drink, mulling over everything he could possibly say. There was so much he wanted to say, to admit, to ask, but what did he really want?  
  
What did he want from Minseok?  
  
Luhan wasn't sure he really knew the answer to that question.  
  
xXx  
  
It only took a couple more hours of deep thought and a trip to the florist before Luhan was called back by Sehun, saying that Minseok had finally woken up. Yifan was already awake when Luhan had returned, and was trying to convince Sehun to let him into his appa's room first.  
  
"Yifan, I know you want to see your appa, but your father needs to have a talk with him first. I promise you can see him straight after, but for now, let your baba see your appa," Sehun said soothingly as Yifan pleaded with the man.  
  
"Yifan, it won't take long, I promise," Luhan said as he approached his son, placing a comforting hand on the tall teenager's shoulder. "Besides, Kyungsoo needs someone familiar with him right now."  
  
"Kyungsoo hates me, Baba," Yifan said weakly. Luhan had never seen his son look so lost.  
  
"He doesn't hate you, Yifan," Luhan said firmly. "He's just scared and taking it out on the person he's closest to. What he needs now is his big brother close to him so he doesn't feel alone. Can you do that, Yifan? You can even sit near the door if you want."  
  
Slowly, Yifan nodded, casting his eyes down as he made his way back to his sleeping brothers, not noticing the worried look his father and stepfather were giving him.  
  
Luhan turned to Sehun. "Watch him, please." He didn't even wait for the latter to nod, simply slipping into the room to face the man who messed with his heart.  
  
xXx  
  
Minseok sat up slowly as Luhan entered the room, a bouquet of flowers in his hand. The latter placed them in the empty vase next to the former's bedside table before sitting down by Minseok's left.  
  
"How... How are you?" Luhan asked hesitantly.  
  
"Could be better, I suppose," Minseok replied softly, not really looking at Luhan.  
  
Luhan cleared his throat. "If you want to know, Yifan and Kyungsoo are okay. Yifan was crying his eyes out when he heard what happened, and he wanted to see you, but he fell asleep as soon as we arrived. Silly kid," Luhan said, shaking his head fondly.  
  
Minseok gave a small smile. "He's always been a secret worrier. Like you." He swallowed and let out a sigh. "Why did you come, Luhan?"  
  
Luhan looked up at Minseok incredulously. "Why else would I come?"  
  
Minseok sat in silence, before responding. "I can have the papers ready by tomorrow, if you want."  
  
Luhan blinked again. "What- what papers, Minseok?"  
  
"Yifan's custody papers. That's why you're here, right?" Minseok said slowly.  
  
"That's why- _that's why-_ Minseok, that's not why I'm here!" Luhan shouted disbelievingly.  
  
"Look, Luhan. I know Yifan's a lot better in your company now that he's experienced it. Please don't make it harder than it needs to be and just go if that's all you wanted," Minseok said, ignoring Luhan's words. He wanted to be left alone to wallow in his misery.  
  
"Minseok, I thought we already came to some sort of understanding the last time we talked alone, and I'm here because I care and I'm worried about you!" Luhan yelled, making Minseok widen his eyes. "You got yourself into an accident and nearly died! Why the hell won't I be worried and scared?!"  
  
Minseok slowly looked at Luhan's tense figure and serious eyes with genuine shock. "I just... didn't think you would be."  
  
"Maybe I shouldn't, seeing as you're fine now and lied to my face about Kyungsoo too!" Luhan growled, his suppressed fury overshadowing his worry. "I can't believe you hid my other son from me for years, Minseok!"  
  
"I didn't-" Minseok panicked, one of his worst fears coming true. Luhan had finally found out. Was he going to take Kyungsoo too? "At the beginning, I was going to tell you when I found out but then-" He stuttered out, and then shook his head. "It doesn't matter. You know now, anyway." He directed his sad gaze at the younger man. "...I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I should have, but I didn't, and I know probably doesn't mean very much, but I really am sorry," he said, knowing that while an apology was the last thing that could fix it, there was nothing more he could do or say if Luhan wanted to take Kyungsoo too.  
  
Luhan just let out a long breath after a pause, his anger deflating just as quickly as it came. "I know you are. And, I should be angrier about this than I am now, but I'm not. Besides, I'm too worried about you," he replied. "Just because we're not married anymore doesn't mean I don't care, Minseok," he said tiredly, running a hand through his hair. "You really did scared me, you know?"  
  
Minseok gazed at the man he still loved even after ten years. "I didn't mean to."  
  
"I'm just glad you're okay, Minseok." Luhan let out a sigh, before remembering Minseok's previous words. "But what you said before; what makes you think that I wanted Yifan's custody papers?"  
  
Minseok looked down into his lap. "I thought Yifan would have asked to stay permanently at yours," he said, confused. "He didn't?"  
  
"No, of course not. He's grown a lot closer to Sehun, Baekhyun and I, but he made no notions about staying. Actually, he had some of his bags packed for next week when he would go back, but you're here now, so..." He trailed off. "What made you think he would want to stay with me? Just because he actually agreed to stay at mine, doesn't mean he didn't miss you and Kyungsoo. He has spent his whole life with you; why would he want to leave?"  
  
"You mean, why wouldn't he?" Minseok murmured before he could stop himself.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Luhan asked, wary that he was treading on dangerous waters concerning Minseok's feelings. That stormy feeling he had felt since the day Minseok had hesitantly approached him about Yifan staying at his house was clearly coming to light.  
  
"Why wouldn't Yifan want to get away from me?" Minseok said, a strong emotion beginning to claw at his chest. "After all, I cheated on his father and hid the truth from him," Minseok said bitterly. "Besides, he's hates me. I'm not sure how he would feel returning back to a place with a person he hates."  
  
"Yifan doesn't hate you, Minseok," Luhan said softly. Despite their turbulent history with each other, he knew Minseok was a good father. Yifan was proof of that. That's why he knew Yifan could never hate Minseok; they had too much love for each other for it to become hate.  
  
"You didn't see him, Luhan," Minseok said, his voice breaking, and tears starting to fall down his face. "You didn't see him when he found those pictures. You didn't hear him when he told me that he hated me. What kind of parent makes their own child hate them?" Minseok bit his lip to hide the sob threatening to escape. "He's better off with you, Luhan. Then he can have a better life without me to screw it up even further."  
  
"If I took Yifan, wouldn't I have to take Kyungsoo too?" Luhan asked. "After all, he's my son too."  
  
Minseok muffled his pained sobs with his hand and nodded his head, not really surprised. "I guess you would have to take him too." He didn't want to part with either of his precious sons, but if it was the right thing to do for their happiness, then he would let them go.  
  
"Why would you let me take them, Minseok?" Luhan questioned gently. After years of being together and then separating, this was the first time Minseok had ever truly opened up to him. It made him worried to know that it was only when Minseok was physically at his weakest was when he would even speak about how he really felt. "Don't you love them?"  
  
"It's because I love them that I would let you have them," Minseok whispered, his voice hoarse. "All I want is for them to be happy and healthy, and I can't do that for them anymore. I tried so hard, thinking that I could provide that for them, alongside everything else, but _I can't,_ Luhan. I'm not a good parent to them, and I can't let them live like this. They deserve better."  
  
Luhan shook his head. "Minseok, I'm not going to take them away from you; at least, I want to able to see them often, but they are your children just as much as they are mine. I may not have been there for the last ten years, and you might have wronged me badly, but I know you are a good parent. Yifan grew up to be a kind and caring brother, as well as a person. Kyungsoo, from what little I saw, is as gentle and friendly as Baekhyun is. They love you, Minseok," Luhan said comfortingly, reaching to pull Minseok's hands away from his face. He slowly wiped the tears away with his own hands, his own heart hurting for the upset man. All he wanted to say was that he still loved him too, no matter how much pain the other had caused him. "And they will always love you, no matter what. Yifan certainly does not hate you; he always manages to bring you and Kyungsoo up in the conversation, and the adoration is clear in his voice. Don't think so badly of yourself, Minseok. They don't need better; they just need you."  
  
"Luhan..." Minseok uttered softly, feeling the warm touch of hands he had not felt in years, and the gentle gaze that he remembered from when they were still in love. He nearly leaned into his hand, only to be reminded by the coolness of Luhan's ring that as much as he yearned, he could not take. "I... Thank you," he said, breathing deeply as his tears slowed to a stop. He felt Luhan's touch leave his face, the warmth lingering on his cheeks. "That means a lot to me."  
  
"I'm glad it does," Luhan replied, his own hands still being reminded of how his Minseok's soft cheeks felt as they fell into the older man’s lap. "What I said was true."  
  
"...Thank you." Minseok nodded in acknowledgement. Before he could say another word, a shuffle at the doorway alerted the two of another presence, and they turned to see who it was.  
  
"Mama?" Yifan stood at the door, eyes wide and tired.  
  
"Yifan?" Minseok uttered, eyes showing how much he missed his eldest. He shifted slightly, trying look like he was feeling better, but the facade quickly crumbled when a lone tear slide down the teen's face.  
  
"Mama, is that really how you feel?" Yifan asked, voice shaky.  
  
Minseok glanced at his son worriedly and pushed Luhan's hands away, feeling a sense of panic. His son wasn't supposed to hear all of that. "Yifan-"  
  
Yifan let out a little pained wail, and stumbled over his long legs to get to his father, climbing on to the bed and clinging to Minseok's neck as gently as he could, sobbing loudly into the man's shoulder. It looked so odd - a tall, lanky teenager clinging tightly to a smaller man on the bed. " _I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry Mama I love you so much-_ ” He babbled messily, clenching his father's shirt.  
  
Minseok hugged his son tightly, feeling his own tears fall at the sight of his son so upset. "Baby, It's okay," he hushed Yifan tenderly, petting his son's hair.  
  
Yifan pulled back to look at his father's face. "It's not okay! I said I hated you but I didn't mean it, I swear!" Yifan’s eyes watered even further. "You are a good parent to me, to Soo. If you left I don't know what I would do... I'm so sorry, Mama. I'm sorry I made you cry, I'm sorry I ignored you, I'm sorry I couldn't apologise properly, I'm sorry I'm not a good son-" Yifan whimpered at the end. "F-forgive me please, Mama..." His desperate babbling turned into incoherent sobs, loud and heartbreaking for both his parents to witness.  
  
Minseok cupped Yifan's tear-streaked face with his hands as he felt his heart throb painfully, but it was a good sign - to know that his precious son had never stopped loving him was a blessing and something he never wanted to lose. "Oh baby, of course I forgive you. I always will," he said, a watery smile on his face. "I love you so much, baby."  
  
Yifan hiccupped and buried his face into Minseok's shirt, curling up against the male as much as his big body would allow him to as he sobbed his guilt away in the arms of his loving father. It only took his a few minutes before he fell asleep, the exhaustion and emotional outlet he had felt the entire day wearing him down.  
  
After a few moments of just watching his eldest sleep in his ex-husband's lap, Luhan made a move to leave, not wanting to intrude on the moment any longer than he felt he was allowed to. But Minseok stopped him, reaching out his hand. "Luhan, stay. Please," Minseok asked, his hand still outstretched. "I know you want answers, and I think you deserve to have them answered."  
  
Luhan hesitated before moving back to his seat as he saw Minseok's hand go back to Yifan's head, stroking his hair gently.   
  
"I... First, thank you for listening to me without blowing up completely. I never thought that we would even be sitting here, having this conversation. Honestly, I thought you'd be much angrier and take both my sons away from me as soon as you got the chance," Minseok admitted. He grabbed some tissues with his free hand, clearing up his wet face and Yifan's. "I know I already apologised for not telling you about Kyungsoo, but I want to explain some things, while you're here and listening, if you want to know."  
  
"Yes, I do." Luhan's expression became one of confusion as it was suddenly brought back up. "Minseok, why didn't you tell me?"  
  
Minseok let out a long breath. "I... When I first found out, around two months after we got a divorce, I wanted to say something, but at that time we weren't even speaking, so I didn't contact you. When we next saw each other..." He trailed off, the painful memory surfacing in his brain.  
  
"...It was at the cafe," Luhan filled in, remembering well. It was when he and Sehun decided to go on a 'date' for the first time since finding out about Baekhyun.  
  
"Yeah," Minseok nodded. "You were there with Sehun-ssi. I was seven months, I think, and you were with Sehun-ssi, who was clearly a few months pregnant too." Minseok swallowed to stop his throat from drying up and tightening. "I already wasn't considering to tell you before that because I didn't think you'd believe me anyway, not after the reason for our divorce. Seeing you with Sehun-ssi only reinforced that idea, so I never said anything." He looked at his hands in his lap. "I couldn't stomach the thought of you rejecting me- or rather, us."  
  
Luhan opened mouth to immediately deny Minseok's words, but then closed it again. Ten years ago, shameful as it was to admit to himself, he would have rejected Minseok's claim. Firstly because the sting of the divorce was still very fresh then, and he hadn't wanted to see Minseok's face as he knew it would only make him angry and bitter, and of course, assume the child wasn't his. The other reason was that he had already committed himself to Sehun just a week before that. Even if he had believed Minseok, he still wouldn't have gone back as he had already promised to raise his and Sehun's child as a family - an unconventional one, but a family nonetheless. Regardless of how Baekhyun had been conceived, he was a blessing in Luhan's life, just like his other children were, and deserved to have both his parents.  
  
Minseok saw the reluctant agreement on Luhan's face, and he shook his head. "Don't feel guilty, Luhan. If I were in your exact shoes, not knowing the things I know, I would have reacted in exactly the same way. I understand, Luhan, I really do. Yes, it would have and did hurt me badly, but I really do understand."  
  
Luhan shook his head, pulling away from the other man. It was beginning to sound like the start of their many talks that ended badly. "Minseok, I really don't think you understand. Ten years ago, I thought our marriage was perfect - we had a wonderful child, a comfy home, good friends, and a strong relationship. How do you think I felt when those photos of my husband with his boss showed up at my office, having just seen you and him together with our son a few nights before? After all those-" He cut himself off with a defeated sigh, running his fingers through his messy hair. "You broke my heart, Minseok. No matter how much you can empathise with me, I don't think you truly could understand how I feel because you never were in my shoes."  
  
Minseok felt himself getting mildly frustrated and desperate; this was his only chance to get Luhan to listen to him. After this, there would be no more chances, and Luhan truly would be lost to him forever. "Luhan, please, please, listen to me. I know when I told you the first time and all the times after that, you didn't believe me, but I was telling you the truth." Minseok could hear how pathetic he sounded, but he didn't care. If Luhan didn't believe him now, he never would. "I didn't do it. He... He... Luhan, I beg you, just this once, believe in me." Minseok grabbed Luhan's hand tightly before the other could even react. "I want to fix this, this broken relationship between us, because our children deserve better than their parents hating each other. We don't even need to be friends, Luhan, but I need you to believe what I say."  
  
"Minseok, how can you deny all of the evidence?" Luhan gave Minseok a disbelieving look. "We've already gone through this so many times - the pictures- Minseok, we didn't have the kind of technology to alter photos like we can today, and those were clear shots of you cheating on me!" Luhan shouted the last bit in anger, jerking his hand out of Minseok's grip and stood up to leave the room. He couldn't believe that Minseok was still trying to deny it after all that had happened. After all he had _seen_.  
  
The male muffled his choked sob as Luhan turned his back on him, hoping Yifan wouldn't wake up as the teenager stirred in his lap. "Luhan, please! I have proof!" He called out to the male, his last words being his only hope for the male to turn back around.  
  
"...What?" Luhan didn't turn around, but he stopped before he reached the door. "What do you mean you have proof?"  
  
"My belongings... I have this black bag with a white tribal symbol at home, and there's proof in there," Minseok said quietly. "If you can bring it to me, I can explain everything, I swear." He kept his gaze on Luhan's back, knowing that, although the man couldn't see him, he could feel the intensity of his stare. "Luhan, let me try to fix this one last time, please. Then, you can choose to do whatever you want."  
  
"If I bring the bag and I still don't like what I find, I want you to promise that you'll stay out of my life forever," Luhan said, his hand leaning heavily against the doorframe. "We'll get shared custody of the kids, but I never want to see you again, understand? I can't deal with it if it turns out you're lying to me, Minseok, because you can't deny those pictures. I want to believe you, but you truly broke my trust in you." Luhan looked at Minseok unwaveringly. "Don't make this the one of the last times we see each other."  
  
And with that, he walked out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fan girl moment:  
> OMG did you see all them EXO teasers omg of course you did why am I asking such a silly question hahaha  
> Literally cannot wait for these next three days to pass so I can satisfy my need for those MVs and so these boys can slay my entire existence  
> Go EXO!
> 
> EDITED: 05/01/17


	7. Chapter 6: Regret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, look who's back.

Minseok had drifted off with Yifan still thankfully asleep in his lap after Luhan had left, only to wake up an hour later and feel the slight ache from his injuries. He sat up on his bed, settling himself deep in thought as he waited for Luhan to come back.  
  
He knew that the evidence to clear his name would be enough for a court case, so he knew it would be enough to make Luhan believe him. What he didn't understand was why Luhan was so set in believing that he had cheated. The pictures were incriminating, yes, but to believe that Minseok had cheated on him for months rather than once, like the photos suggested? He didn't understand where the accusation was coming from, and Luhan never tried to explain it either. It was like he was trying to avoid answering the question.  
  
Luhan was never forthcoming about the details of what had made him believe the pictures over his own husband, but Minseok knew it had to be something else - something that had planted the seed of doubt in the man's brain. It wasn't a topic he wanted to dwell on, but Minseok knew that if they were ever going to get to at least friendly terms, they had to get to the bottom of the truth.  
  
Now logically, he knew Luhan had the right to be angry with what little he knew, but at the same time, Minseok couldn't help but feel frustrated and bitter; the same emotions he had felt when Luhan had first left and divorced him, and whenever they met up, only to argue.  
  
He wanted to scream - he didn't do it. He would _never_ cheat on Luhan like that.  
  
There was a bitter side to him that felt a sick sort of growing satisfaction at the thought of Luhan finally realising that he had divorced him for all the wrong reasons, but a bigger part of him just felt lost and hurt.  
  
He loved Luhan - would always love him, no matter how often they would clash even now - but he know that the possibility of fixing everything after this was still very low.  
  
Sure, after ten long years, Luhan would finally believe him - reluctantly or not - but it didn't mean they would, or even could, get back together. Ten years of doubt, resentment, and separation had changed them and their lives. Even if Luhan still felt love for him, the man had a family; something Minseok had no heart in breaking. Luhan had his son with Sehun to raise, Minseok still had his sons to take care of in the same way. The lives they led now had no room for just Luhan and Minseok, not like it did all those years ago when it was just the three of them.  
  
And that was what pained Minseok most.  
  
He mourned the future they never got, because had it never happened, Minseok would be living his life with Luhan. He would be bringing his boys to school and picking them up before and after work, would greet Luhan after a long day in the office, would have a normal family meal, would cuddle on the sofa with a mug of hot chocolate, watching a movie as they drifted off to sleep in their cosy seats.  
  
He would still be Luhan's husband and lover. Someone Luhan still loved.  
  
It was then that a knock on the open door and a voice interrupted Minseok's inner musings. "You know, you could contemplate all the 'what if's in the world, but it still won't change that what happened, happened."  
  
Minseok turned to look at who was standing at the doorway, and saw Sehun with a knowing look plastered on his face.  
  
"I used to have that look on my face all the time, you know. Before I married Luhan, that is," Sehun said before silently asking if he could come in. With Minseok's permission, he set himself down on the chair near the hospitalised man's left side as he continued, saying it almost to himself. "Now, I only ever wonder if he's happy without me."  
  
Minseok eyed Sehun curiously, wondering why the male was just sitting there and talking, and so he asked. "Not to be rude, but why are you here?" He questioned, genuinely curious. He and Sehun didn't even know each other. He wasn't even sure if he liked the other man, to be honest.  
  
"Well, I thought you'd like to know that I dropped my son and your son off with a good friend of mine, so they're in safe hands - it's been a long day for them, and they need to rest. I was actually on my way to pick Yifan up so he could get some actual sleep too." Sehun furrowed his eyebrows. "However, I do think I need to talk to you, because Luhan's worried about you, and I'm worried about him, so I've decided that worrying about you should also be my business."  
  
Despite his wariness around the younger, Minseok snorted at the male's remark. "Thank you, for looking after my son, but what you said doesn't even make any sense. You don't need to care just because my ex-husband does."  
  
"Well, considering earlier Luhan walked out with a tense look on his face without saying a word, I think I'm entitled to worry, aren't I?" Sehun arched a brow carefully, questioning eyes probing Minseok's face for any facial tells.  
  
"It's nothing," Minseok simply said, dismissing Sehun's underlying question.  
  
"It's not _nothing_ if Luhan looked like he was about to have breakdown right there and then," Sehun replied sharply, eyes narrowed slightly. "Did you have another argument?"  
  
Minseok sighed, running his hand through Yifan's hair in an attempt to calm himself. "Yes, and no." He cleared his throat, unsure if he really wanted to tell Sehun the truth. "It started off alright, and the same stupid topic came up and we argued again, that's all."  
  
"Luhan wouldn't leave in silence if that was the only thing you said to each other," Sehun said sceptically. "Usually, he comes home fuming and ranting after a fight with you."  
  
"Look, I don't even understand why it matters," Minseok snapped, sick of talking to a stranger who could care less about his wellbeing. Just because the man was married to his ex didn't mean he could intrude in his life like that. "You should have just gone to Luhan if you wanted answers."  
  
"Look, I'm asking you because I think that you're the only one who can start fixing whatever it is going on between you and Luhan, alright?" Sehun sighed and leaned back on his chair a bit. "Besides, Luhan is stubborn - you and I both know that. If I came to him asking the same things, he'd just dismiss it like it was trivial thing. You however - you're not even trying to pretend it was as pleasant as you hoped, but you're still trying. I can respect that." Sehun ran a hand through his hair, suddenly looking weary and tired. "I know you don't like me, and I understand why, so I won't hold it against you. But I want you and Luhan to have a better relationship, and you want it too, so I need you to tell me what I can do to help. Please."  
  
Minseok narrowed his gaze at Sehun contemplatively. "Why do want to help so much? What do you get out of this?"  
  
"Honestly? I know this will relieve the burden on Luhan's shoulders." Sehun let out a little fond huff, obviously thinking about the older male. "Despite the arguments you and him have been having for the past few years, he's been frustrated over the fact that he can't control his temper and reconcile with you. But this year, it's starting to get somewhere." The man shot a glance at the door and then at the teen in Minseok's lap. "Besides, my son enjoys Yifan's company. I know that he feels lonely being the only child and is a lot happier since getting to know your son." He looked Minseok in the face with his next words, brown eyes serious. "You of all people know that we would do anything for our sons."  
  
Minseok let out a deep sigh as he considered Sehun's words. He didn't have many fond feelings for the male, but he could respect the fact that he cared for his son as much as he did, and that he wasn't here to purposely antagonise him. "He left to get something from my apartment. It's evidence that I did not cheat on him with my ex-boss." Sehun only hummed in understanding, which confused Minseok. He eyed the younger man in question. "You believe me?"  
  
"Well, I wasn't there to have a real opinion on it. Luhan believed you cheated on him and told me, so I was inclined to believe him too. However, if you're saying that you have proof for your innocence, I guess I'll have to trust you on that. I wasn't there to witness your divorce, so I can't judge." Sehun shrugged. "I don't think you're a bad person, Minseok-ssi. Maybe you're lying and did cheat on him, which makes you a bad partner, and maybe you didn't. Either way, I don't think you're a bad person - you couldn't be, with how you've raised your sons. You're trying to fix the mistakes between you two without giving up after ten years, which is more than I can say for me."  
  
Minseok gave a small smile as he saw Sehun's hand move closer to Yifan, fingering the soft locks on the teenager's head. A strange curiosity overcame him then, wanting to know more about the man in front of him. "Can I ask, Sehun-ssi-"  
  
"Just call me Sehun."  
  
"-Sehun, then, if you call me Minseok. Since we're talking about exes, I was wondering... You seem to mention this guy that you haven't made up with a lot. Was he someone you loved too? If you don't mind me asking."  
  
"I don't mind, but yes. Yes, he was." Sehun's smile dropped, replaced by a regretful one. Brushing his hand past the thin chain around his neck that he always had under his shirt, he looked into the distance, memories clouding his eyes. "But it was my mistake, not his. I was forced to choose between my family and him. And I... Well."  
  
"You chose wrong, didn't you?"  
  
"Yes. And even though I cut ties with my family in the end, I know I'll regret picking them for the rest of my life, because there's no chance of me ever seeing him again, even if Luhan thinks there is." He turned his gaze back to bedridden male. "You know, I love Luhan a lot, and I just don't want either of you to make the same mistake. I don't want you to regret your decisions for the rest of your life."  
  
As the two lapsed into silence, Minseok let out a deep breath, thinking about Sehun's words and agreeing. Neither did he.  
  
xXx  
  
Entering the apartment using the secret keys he knew Minseok would have hidden under the wooden hanging post above the doorway (it was something they had been doing since they moved in together), Luhan passed by the frame of a younger Minseok and his two sons in the hallway, the same pang of longing from the last time he visited hitting him as he saw the soft smile on Minseok's face. He paused, and a feeling of dreaded anticipation washed over him as he remembered what he was in the house for.  
  
When he had walked out of the hospital, all he could feel was a pit of regret at the bottom of his stomach because although he what he said was true - that he had little trust in Minseok, that he didn't know what he would do if Minseok was lying, if the evidence wasn't enough - he hadn't meant to take it out on the other. It was a reoccurring theme that he hated; he'd get angry, shout, leave, feel guilty, regret. It frustrated him to no end because everything about Minseok just made him an emotional wreck, whether in fondness or anger.  
  
Even now, as he approached the Minseok's bedroom, he could feel the remaining emotions from his argument earlier, an uncomfortable stirring under his gut, and fuelled with apprehension about the contents of Minseok's bag. Honestly, a part of him wanted to run away from this - from his feelings, from the current situation, from Minseok.  
  
But he couldn't.  
  
He owed it to himself and to Minseok to put the whole thing to rest, whether or not it ended in them completely separated from each other.  
  
Shifting through the room with hastened steps, Luhan eventually spotted the black bag and yanked it open and dumped the contents onto the bed before he could stop himself in a mixture of fear and hesitation. Stacks of papers poured out, looking as though they had been haphazardly stuffed into a small space. Shifting through the pile with shaky hands, Luhan came across a single piece of paper and a bounded stack of photos.  
  
The same ones sent to him.  
  
It took all of Luhan's strength not to collapse on the bed. Instead, he let the photos fall onto the bed and took in deep breaths as he felt the beginnings of an uneasy queasiness in his stomach.  
  
_Minseok wasn't lying._  
  
_He wasn't lying; he was telling the truth- he was telling the truth, but then what about the-_  
  
Luhan broke away from his thoughts as he steadied himself with a hand on the bed, pushing the remaining papers to the side and trying not to fall over.  
  
His concentration quickly broke, however, when another photo attracted his attention - an older one of Minseok, from the feel of worn edges and the boyish cheeks shown in the picture. Picking it up, he stared at it inquisitively, wondering why he had never seen the photo before. After all, he had seen all the photo albums Minseok had kept from his childhood.  
  
Luhan shifted through the papers where it had been shoved between to see if there were more, then paused when he reached a small section of colourful papers that he hadn't spotted under the pile of white, the word 'Kim' jumping out at him on the first sheet.  
  
He read through the first page, but only when he reached the middle did he feel something in him lurch and then snap.  
  
_This was- That photo, it wasn't-_  
  
It was like someone had pulled a white blanket over his mind whilst trying to process the words before him, making his head throb. He could hear the pounding clear as day, and then something yanked him out violently, and he found himself hastily grabbing the papers and bag off the bed and bolting out the door.  
  
He needed to see Minseok. Now.  
  
xXx  
  
It had been three hours since Luhan had first stepped out the door, and Minseok was starting to feel tired. Sehun had taken Yifan to his friend's house a while ago, leaving Minseok alone to wait for Luhan to return. It was only when he decided to have a little nap, that a set of pounding footsteps alerted him to Luhan's presence a few seconds before the male entered the room, ruffled and looking like he had run from Minseok's apartment to the hospital.  
  
"What are these?" Luhan demanded without a greeting, throwing the papers down onto Minseok's lap. He looked frazzled and panicked, something Minseok had never seen before.  
  
Minseok gave Luhan a confused look. "Evidence that those photos were a frame-up. I already told you-"  
  
"No, these," Luhan said insistently, jabbing his finger on top of a pile of papers. The first page was a faded pink, while the rest were a pale yellow and clipped together - different colours to the rest, and something Minseok didn't remember picking up. "Minseok, tell me these aren't real. Tell me these aren't fucking real, _please_."  
  
Minseok grasped the paper and scanned the top of the sheet before his eyes widened as he came across a familiar name. "What the hell? That can't be-" He broke off, mind racing to try and comprehend the words on the paper. "Luhan, they're real- I can't believe this-"  
  
It seemed like it wasn't the reaction Luhan was looking for, but expecting anyway, as he let out a defeated sigh and sank down onto the edge of bed, running his hand through his unkempt hair. "That's... what I thought. Fuck, Minseok, how is this even possible-"  
  
"Is there- is there a photo that came with it?" Minseok's voice trembled as he cut Luhan off, his eyes never leaving the page. Luhan nodded, handing over a picture with worn edges to a shaken man. Minseok wordlessly glanced at the photo in his hands before looking at Luhan with a wavering, disbelieving look. "How did you find this?"  
  
"It was with all the other papers you said were in the bag. Surely you must have seen it too-?"  
  
Minseok shook his head, staring at the picture. "N-no, I found the papers I wanted to show you but then someone was coming as I was grabbing them, so I just took the entire contents of the drawer before I hid and left. I didn't have time to look through them all before the accident." His words sounded distance, even to his own ears.  
  
"Minseok...?"  
  
"I... I can't believe this," Minseok muttered, as if speaking to himself. "This... All this time... He..." He tore his eyes away from the photo and scanned the remaining papers, mouthing the written words mindlessly. " _Pay-to-hire basis... Clients free to do as they please within certain limitations... Permission to..."_ Minseok read the yellow pages - a contract with a page dedicated to fine print - feeling more and more horrified as he read though it.  
  
And then it dawned on him.  
  
He grabbed Luhan's wrist tightly, making the pale man look at him. "Luhan... Please, tell why you believed that I had cheated. Please tell me it was just because of the pictures from some anonymous sender. Please tell me its not- not because of _this-_ " Because if the papers he had in his hands had anything to do with it, then it was all a huge mistake and a deliberate set-up, and their lives had been ruined over it.  
  
It made Minseok want to throw up at the thought.  
  
Luhan dropped Minseok's gaze completely and simply stared at the photo in Minseok's free hand. He was struggling to comprehend the information he had just been given, and a part of him just wanted to reject it all. "...I'm sorry, Minseok... I- I never said anything to anyone, not even to Sehun, because even thinking about it just made me so angry that it _terrified_ me. Months before the photos, I was sent video files through an unknown email. It was of you... having sex with other men, and it was always filmed in the same room - your office. At first, I deleted them straight away once I had opened them. I wanted so badly to believe it wasn't you - that it wasn't my husband going out there and have sex with other men. But as I kept receiving all the videos, I... It was all _you_. Coupled with the fact that you weren't home because you were working, and the videos had coinciding time-stamps... And then the last strike was your boss-" Luhan's gaze turned to Minseok suddenly, eyes pleading. Pleading for the older male to understand. "How could I believe anything else, Minseok? How, when after the videos, came those damned photos and that stupid dinner with your stupid boss?" He grabbed Minseok's hands, startling the other man as the photograph was slightly crumbled by the movement. There was pain in Luhan's eyes, mixed in with slow realisation and regret. So much regret. "The videos of your moans, the little squirm you would make when someone touched your side, the twitch of your hands after sex- how could I believe anything else when all I saw was you?"  
  
Minseok gasped quietly at Luhan's confession, hands unmoving he let the photo slip from his fingers to the bed sheets. "But it wasn't me, Luhan. It wasn't me."  
  
Minseok felt so numb. It wasn't fair.  
  
Luhan choked on a dry sob at Minseok's words, head bowing as his trembling fingers clenched tightly around Minseok's own limp ones. "I know- god, I know, I _know_."  
  
Minseok said nothing but stared at the photo of the man who had torn the man he loved away from him for ten years.  
  
Kim Xiumin, his missing twin brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long to get out. Admittedly, I had half of this written five months ago, but I couldn't get the rest of it out in words like I wanted. Also, summer holidays and uni. I was basically busy in the sweltering heat and with slow, limited internet for a month, and whoever said it was going to be chill in the first year of uni _lied._ I also have so many other various stories that have I started, and barely any of them are finished lol.  
>  So don't worry, I am writing bits and pieces, but just bear in mind, that it won't be this one all the time :/  
> Until next time!


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